what i did today

sleep talking.

2011-08-05T19:27:00.000-07:00

"I LIKE COOL STUFF!!" screams gideon, in a stone cold sleep.

so we went to disneyland.

2011-08-04T20:58:00.000-07:00

before i forget all the little things...

we didn't try to go early and there was no rush to our day. we were staying at the park and knew we'd have time to do whatever we wanted to do. the "plan" was to go to the park when we got there and do the pool the next day. the pool with 3 water slides that we didn't tell the kids about. we didn't tell the kids about anything, actually.

we checked in and were surprised by an upgraded room. a one bedroom suite overlooking the pool and from which we could see fireworks at night. in the bedroom the headboard was one big thing over both beds with the park and fireworks done up in led lights set into wood. you could press a button to play "when you wish upon a star". amazing. we stared at the pool. and decided to skip the park that day. we spent the next few hours in the pool and hot tub. on the slides over and over. heaven. when we made it back to the room with our DVDs checked out from the lounge the kids crawled into bed and watched the 3 Caballeros until the boys passed out. Mia got her giggle on and we watched the fireworks and ate brownies Kate brought back from the lounge. And lemon bars. So. Many. Lemon bars. Then Fantasia and sleep. Followed by kids falling out of bed and switching beds and snoring and wiggling.

The "plan" to get up early and hit the park before general admission began was quickly abandoned. We slept in and barely made the check out time. We ate and lazed on over to the park around noon. Gideon hit a wall and we got a stroller right away. Mia was a champ. And ready to ride.

First we hit It's a Small World. Magic. Mia sang and we all sat in wonder (cheeeeeeesy!!) and enjoyed the AC. Then we made the mistake of doing the Pirates of the Caribbean ride. Fail. After a longer than promised wait Gideon, 4.5, had the same reaction I had at that age. Terror. Screaming. Hated every second except the giant floating head of Blackbeard. And that ride? Is really long. Mia was clutching her chest and saying "I've been shot again!" And while funny...it wasn't helpful. Ha.

After the breakdown and escape from the pirate cave we found Kate and Elliott in the restaurant where they had claimed a booth and scoped the menu. Kate is amazing. A good reset button pusher.

We rode the flying rockets - even Gideon! There were no tears or freak outs. We went up and down without incident. Elliott fell asleep as soon as we were back in the strollers and on the go. We headed straight for Space Mountain with our Fast Passes. And that's when Gideon lost his shit. So tired, that one. He didn't want me to leave because he "wouldn't have anyone to snuggle!" Um..we weren't snuggling while he was in the stroller. Only so much a little man can take. But Kate is, as I've said, amazing. Mia and I ran off while Gideon stayed with Kate and her magical phone of wonder. Holy, did Mia ever have a good time. I couldn't hear or see her until the end of the ride and honestly? I have never seen her smile so big - her eyes so wide. Unfortunately you couldn't see her head at all in the photo. We ran back to Gideon and then Kate took her on one more time. Such goodness.

Off to Toon Town! Elliott was still asleep so Kate rested in Goofy's Garden and the kids and I explored all the houses. And then? Then we got to meet Mickey. Or as Gideon calls him, Mick. Oh man. That boy was so excited. You could feel it coming off of him. Mia tried not to be as excited as she was but she was in wonder, too. Pictures will be ordered. Mia and I rode the Roger Rabbit roller coaster and then we were all done. Hard to believe that's all we really did but that's it. We wandered and snacked and bought some souvenirs and were in the car (valet at the hotel) by 8:30. Easy Peasy Perfect.

Disney and cousins and swimming, oh my!

2011-07-28T15:12:00.000-07:00

Suddenly it's mid-2011, Mia is about to start 2nd grade, Gideon is about to start kindergarten (1st of 2 years due to his birthday) and life is just...well it's changing fast around here so I figured it was time to start keeping track of it all in one place again.

The kids and I are visiting family in SoCal and are blessed with family that will take us in and share in the wealth that is the Disney Employee Discount. We stayed at the Disneyland Hotel in an amazing suite overlooking the pools. We watched the fireworks from the room (just the girls since the boys passed out while watching Fantasia. We gorged on desserts and snacks in the lounge. Good times.

We have been living it up in the pool, napping until late in the day, giggling and giggling.

Yesterday while Gideon was napping he rolled over and exclaimed "I like cool stuff!" and was out again. It's true, he does like cool stuff.

Saturday is the little cousin's birthday party (3! He will be 3!) and then sunday it's back to reality for a little bit. Still summer...not completely reality...but not vacation.

what's your name?

2009-06-08T18:25:00.000-07:00

mama: hey, little dude, what's your full name?
little dude: gideon eugene GET OUT OF THAT BATHROOM!

swimming suits.

2009-05-31T16:17:00.000-07:00

upon finding my kids in the backyard in buckets and random swimming suits...

mama: um...what's going on?
mia: gideon is wearing my swimming suit and he looks like a girl. and i fit into your suit.
mama: oh, ok.

she totally didn't fit in my suit. her bootie hung out the back. and yes, gideon looked like a girl.

snack

2009-05-31T16:15:00.000-07:00

gideon: my penis is a snack.
mama: what was that, gideon?
gideon: i SAID... my penis. is. a snack! **sigh**
mama: oh, ok.

this time last year.

2008-02-14T13:15:00.000-08:00

i had already been admitted and was hooked up to many an iv. the hospital was given strict instructions not to deliver this baby on valentines day. i wouldn't do that to my kid. it's in my file.

a year ago we were a family of three with no idea what kind of trouble we were in for. what kind of joy and heartache. the sleep deprivation like we'd never experienced. the joy of watching our kids love each other. the traveling nightmares. the giggles. on year. and our lives are completely different. no turning back.

the last time i updated this blog we didn't know about gideon's food allergies. we thought he was grumpy and moody and didn't sleep well and oh my god - what the hell?! and then we started feeding him solid foods. and things got worse. way worse. there was vomiting. and mucous stool. and no sleeping. and sadness. and skin reactions. turns out he's highly allergic to soy, dairy, peanuts. tree nuts, squash, tomatoes, bananas. and mildly allergic to a whole host of other things we're working on adding to his diet. it's been a hell of a ride. but sine we've eliminated these things from his (and my) diet we've met a whole new kid. sure, he still doesn't sleep - but he's HAPPY. and he's not afraid to eat anymore. every time i think about how he looked, how he cried, how he vomited in his sleep - it kills my heart a little. that it took us so long to figure it out. and yet, we figured it out and now he's just thriving.

siblings. i could not have hoped for a better relationship between my children. we braced ourselves for mia's jealousy once gideon became more active. was able to pull her hair and take toys from her (which he does). and so far it hasn't happened. she loves him so hard. takes all his abuse and only occasionally pushes him over. she hugs him and snuggles him and he pulls her hair and then tries to kiss her with his open mouth. they're friends. and i hope it lasts. they have each other forever. are more a part of each other than they are a part of either me or josh. i hope they learn that sooner than i did with my siblings.

so gideon at a year: he's still not walking but i think it's only because it takes too long to figure out right now. he's much faster on his hands and feet. hates having his diaper changed and needs restraining every. single. time. still no words. sounds, sure. but no words. no mama. all things are "da" except when he's all done eating - that's "a da". and come to think of it, he's traded in the signing for milk which changed to a clicking sound he used to tell me he wanted milk to saying "na" and signing "all done". so that's weird. and he's not sleeping through the night. at all. but whatever - we won't go there. he is getting into everything in the house that he's not supposed to, giggling as he bites my nipples, playing coy with every lady he meets, pretends to eat you as he goes to kisses you. because we eat him up so much. that's just the best. he has crazy wild hair that we won't be cutting anytime soon. he has 7 teeth.

i just. i can't imagine my life without him. but he's killing me slowly. he is, as mia says, TROUBLE. and we love it.

happy almost birthday, little man. happy valentine's day to 1/3 of my heart.

the best way to wake up.

2007-08-25T08:14:00.000-07:00

now, we've not been getting much sleep for the past 6 months but it doesn't seem to matter once 6 (if we're lucky) rolls around. gideon stops chomping on the boob in a frantic manner and suddenly is awake. wide awake. with the giggles and the putting of his fingers in our mouths and rolling back and forth between us. and then we hear mia in the next room exclaiming, "hey guys, i made it light!" as she turns on her bug light. she's known how to do this for ages and ages but suddenly it's as though she's creating light from scratch and oh! what a miracle she's performing! and then there is family snuggling and giggling.

of course then we start in with the whining and the pooping and the rest of the things that will fill our day until nighttime. but those few minutes first thing in the morning? make the sleep deprivation worthwhile.

mooma nuba booba

2007-08-20T23:03:00.000-07:00

mia is making up her own language these days. makes us all repeat it. speaks to her animals in tongues. her imagination is taking shape so beautifully these days. so big. so crazy. she makes "beds" all over the house with baby blankets, tucking us all in and singing us songs.

it's definitely something to do with the age, which i think is odd. i met her uncle, ze'ev when he was 2.5 and he was busily putting people to sleep. her friend "A" was doing the same thing when she was 2.5. josh and i both thought these were 2 of the funniest, most imaginiative, WEIRD little kids we'd ever met. and now we have one. it's pretty awesome.

she's also very shy right now. tells me she's going to be shy before we get to whatever event we're scheduled to. hides behind me for about 20 minutes and then lets loose with the crazy. typical toddler.

not so typical? she's weirded out by babies that aren't gideon. really weirded out. but when you really think about it? babies are weird. they stare, don't say anything, maybe babble unintelligibly, make sudden lunging movements before falling on their faces, are often covered in their own bodily fluids. i guess i forgot to tell josh how freaked out she was with the babies. he took her with him to drop gideon off at his class (per usual) when a 10 month old walked (yup) up to mia and squealed in her general direction. mia hid. nearly cried. stupid babies. hee.

breakthrough!

2007-08-01T22:10:00.000-07:00

we have teeth, people. i repeat, we have teeth. and we hate them. they are evil and not really all that necessary.

so gideon's not a good sleeper. he's a sweet baby. he loves his mama (and her boobs) but he does not like to sleep alone. or without the boob. or while you sit. or for longer than 2.5 hours. that said...last week he started eating some rice cereal at night and lo! he slept! from 6:30 until between 1-3 in the morning. and then back down again until 6. it was miraculous. but then came saturday. saturday he decided that food was not only a waste of time but was disgusting as well. it's not a boob! and sleeping is also for babies. stupid babies who do not appreciate the boob. saturday night he was up every hour or so for a nibble and a cry. at 5 he was tired of talking happily to himself and nursing off and on. i felt a pinch, looked down and saw a happy, wide-eyed little boy stretching my nipple as far as he could and biting me with his very first tooth. "good morning mama, please wake up."

and so it began. there has since been little sleep. lots of crying. many fevers. and still no eating.

and tonight? tonight we have a stomach virus. i was laughing to myself as i wiped him down that josh and i used to wonder how we would know the difference between vomit and spitup with mia (mia who was never sick). ha! if you're wondering? it's not vomit.

debating with a toddler.

2007-07-31T21:39:00.000-07:00

she'll win every time, i tell ya.

mia used to love cheese. only ate cheese. cheese cheese cheese cheese cheese. (of course she didn't poop for like a year but that's a different story) will she eat cheese now? no. "i don't like cheese, mama. when i'm grown up i will like it, but not now. i'm a little girl."

tonight i tried to explain to mia that there was cheese in her macaroni and cheese and that she liked to eat the cheese sauce so she likes cheese! no. no, she does NOT like cheese. she likes macaroni and cheese and that is made of the tiny cheese in the sauce. so there. no cheese for mia.

the gideon update.

2007-06-07T09:49:00.000-07:00

my sweet boy.

at nearly 4 months old he:

* has the best giggle
* loves it when i drag my hair over his face and it takes his breath away
* complains with his deep little voice the moment he wets his diaper or is hungry - he's very serious and grumbly
* chews on anything and everything he can but prefers my fingers. teeth should be making their way in the mext month, i think.
* has fuzzy hair that grows straight up and then curls back on the ends. curly hair to come?
* is a total boob man. it took weeks before he finally agreed to take a bottle and i'm sure he's not happy about it. he would love it if i would let him sleep with my nipple in his mouth all night long. and sometimes i do.
* had the most edible parts. mia eas munching his cheeks the other day and informed me that they were "spicy!" and she needed her drink right away. his toes, however, taste like jelly beans.
* still won't sleep through the night. after an initial 4-5 hours he's up ever 2 hours like clockwork after that.
* has rolled over exactly 4 times front to back. shows no signs of wanting to do that again.
* has the best milk breath
* kicks and giggles like a madman when he's happy. which is a lot.
* is getting more tolerant of the carseat.
* thinks his sister is the most interesting creature in the world.

he no longer feels like a squishy baby in my arms and is heading to boyhood at an alarming rate.

still here. busier than ever.

2007-06-07T09:18:00.000-07:00

the last few months have been so hectic. we were in albuquerque for 3 weeks visiting friends and family. the visit was both really long and way too short. 3 weeks is a long time to be away from your house with 2 small children but not long enough to catch up after a year away.

we stayed with my parents and mia and gideon shared the walk-in closet of the guest room. people think we're nuts for putting our kids in a closet for 3 weeks but i can assure you that they loved it. their own quiet space in an otherwise crazy household? they were in heaven once they settled in.

we had weddings and graduations to attend and the kids were superstars. mia is still pretending to be a "congratulations girl" (pretending to graduate like her uncles did).

mia fell in love all over again with her uncles and aunt. and it was amazing to watch them play with her. she tells me almost daily that she misses them, how much she loves them, and that they should come and visit her. and because her cousin, anthony, couldn't make it to grandma's to visit like we promised her she reminds me that she didn't get to play with "my cousin antony" and that she misses him.

her great-grandma moser gave her the softest teddy bear ever and she has been snuggling it non-stop. she also taught mia to give "smackeroos!" and that's what we get instead of kisses now. a month later and still with the smackeroos!

gideon spent most of his vacation on his back in the middle of an old ottoman, watching the world go by. josh and my dad would play the wii while standign over him and gideon would go nuts kickign and giggling with grandpa. fast friends, those 2. he even got a lesson on debating. sigh...

we came home with 2 weeks of maternity leave left. 2 weeks to soak up the kids and get out as much as we could before we were locked back into a real schedule. 2 weeks to get gideon to take a bottle.

i never dreaded coming back to work when i had mia. i knew i had to, knew she'd be ok at daycare and wasn't all that concerned. with gideon i knew what i was going to be missing and dreaded the end of every day because it brought us one day closer to the end of my leave. and gideon still wasn't taking a bottle.

we started the daycare/work routine on a friday just to test the waters and it's a good thing we did. mia had a great time - was beyond excited to get back to her friends. not gideon. gideon refused the bottle. refused to nap. we both cried. and as i sat there nursing him on my lunch break i looked around the room and realized that these tiny babies? they were going to be his friends one day. that he was going to grow up here. learn to roll* and crawl and walk and talk and play with other kids. these kids. he was growing up right before my eyes.

so that's where we're at. back to the grind.

* gideon did roll over for me right before he went back to daycare. but hasn't since and that's just fine with me.

grandma is here!

2007-04-20T22:01:00.000-07:00

we talk to my mom every day on the phone. i'm sure she's sick of hearing from us all at this point but she still came to visit us for a week (and is taking us back with her for 3 weeks). mia jumped all over her right away and hasn't stopped with the "grandma grandma grandma!" it's as though they see each other all the time. i hope we manage to catch some of their connection in pictures over the next couple of weeks. it's fun to watch mia when my mom does something that mia thought only i did. i play with mia just the way my mom played with me. sing the same songs. tell the same stupid jokes. so thanks, grandma, for making me a good mom. teaching me the fun and the love to share with my kids. grandmas. they are awesome.

in other news - gideon's been here for 9 weeks now. can you believe it? probably. but i can't. as of this week he is 13 lbs. 15 ozs. holy crap. mia was 14 lbs. 4 ozs. at 4 months.

mia-isms

2007-04-11T09:48:00.000-07:00

#1

mia: i have a question.
dad: what is your question mia?
mia: don't talk about ducks.

#2

not today daddy, maybe tomorrow (while shaking her finger at you).

where do the days go?

2007-04-10T20:15:00.000-07:00

i'm not quite sure how over a month has gone by since last we checked in here. i'll do my best to record the things that have happened. the things that have changed. and the things that make my heart stop every day.

mia - a month in review

she's 2.5 years old now. pretty soon she won't be a toddler anymore. she's a big girl now and she'll be the first to tell you that. i thought that she might regress a bit more than she has. that she would want more cuddling and babying. but no. i even try and tell her that she's my baby girl. that she can be a big girl and still be my baby. she's not buying it.

she's throwing a lot more tantrums these days but i think that is more a combination of the boredom of being at home all day, knowing more of what SHE wants and trying to assert her independence.

the hilight of the year so far as been going to a wiggles concert. that's right. a wiggles concert. and oh my god! did we ever have a good time! josh got 2nd row tickets for us and our friends, conchita and josie. it was so funny watching the girls try and figure out what the hell was going on. it took 15 minutes or so to get them to stop looking at the giant tv screen and realize that THE WIGGLES ARE RIGHT IN FRONT OF YOU!! it was the best concert ever.

she's non-stop with the talking. non-stop. it's pure crazy making most days. but oh, her imagination! it's really getting fun to listen to her play in her room or talk to gideon while i'm out of the room. right now i have to fight with her every day to go to the park as she would rather spend an hour in her "pretend park" (her room) making castles and serving me wooden sushi for lunch.

the holidays have come and gone for the spring season, too. we had a nice passover with seders at both josh's parents' house and a friends' house. matzah everywhere! we spent easter alone at the house and josh made sure that mia had an easter basket and hunt of her very own (while gideon slept inside). photos are on flickr - please cruise on over there if you get a chance.

gideon - a month in review

in 2 days my baby boy will be 2 months old. he is already not quite as schlumpy and squishy as a newborn. holding his head up more and more throughout the day. he's strong as an ox. kicking and trashing his arms about. my fierce little warrior. just thinking about how quickly he's growing makes me tear up.

his baby acne went from bad to worse to terrible cradle cap that spread to his face and ears. i think he might have mild excema, nothing terrible, but still, no fun. the acne has cleared up. the cradle cap comes on in spurts and we're keeping the rash to a minimum by not letting him get too hot. but still, his face isn't baby smooth. he's a guy, what can i say?

at 5 weeks he started smiling on his own. by 6 weeks it was all about mama. and now he's giggling, screeching with joy (as well as shrieking when unhappy) and responding to tickles from his big sister and i. and what makes him laugh the most? filling 3 diapers in a row (waiting until the next one is on before pooping again, of course) and peeing all over the wall, changing table and himself). because that? is hilarious.

he loves baths. either on his own on the floor of the tub or floating with me in the deep water. and for a moment afterwards, while josh lathers him with lotion, he is soft.

he hates being in the car when the car isn't moving. initially he hated being in the car at all because he was in the infant car seat (at the highest setting) but we took him out of that really fast and put him in the same car seat that mia's in and he's like a fat man in a lazy boy. comfy and happy. as long as we're moving, that is.

he loves being in the pouch. all curled up tight against my chest. carrying him in the pouch and nursing him to sleep are the two things i will miss most when he's grown.

also loving? the stroller. we have this awesome phil & ted's stroller where he gets to lay down, unrestrained, and either sleep or look up at me while i push him. it's awesome.

he's not sleeping through night yet. it's not killing me yet but soon it will be. one can only take 3 hour stretches of sleep at a time for so long. it's gotten a lot better since we moved him into his own room, though. that's right, people. he's in his own room. it started with me not being able to sleep with him in my armpit anymore. so we moved him to the mini co-sleeper attached to the bed. but he was too big. everytime he thrashed about he would end up with his face pressed against the side and try to nurse. and get pissed off. and scream. and end up in my armpit again. but oh, he's loud. and he trashes about. so for 2-3 hours we'd lay there awake while he slept loudly and violently between us until 20 minutes before he needed to eat again. so yeah. he's in his own room now. we had to buy a velcro swaddling blanket for him because he's too big and strong to hold in a recieving blanket. and now he's happy and quiet and in his own room. it's funny that i would have felt terribly guilty with putting mia in her room so fast (she didn't go in her crib for 4.5 months) but i don't here. i'm much more realistic. he's happy and asleep. i'm getting 3 hours now. all is good.

so that's it. a month in review with tons and tons of stuff that i missed, i'm sure.

week 3

2007-03-13T13:27:00.000-07:00

week 3 has brought us:

* smiles for mama.
* the worst baby acne i've ever seen.
* more awake time.
* more eating!
* already growing out of clothes
* baby hair as soft as a chick's feathers is starting to fall out in patches
* no more stump (actually fell out exactly 14 days after birth - same as mia)
* the beginnings of cooing and not just screaming
* swaddling at night - he still freaks out when asleep, flailing and punching mama in the face. good times.
* nicknames (for parents only!!). we agreed on his name with the condition that nicknames not be allowed. no "gid" or "giddy" would be tolerated. and then i started calling him "bubba" (what?! he's BIG) and then josh started calling him "bubba gid". you (yes, this means YOU) are not allowed to call him this. thank you :)

dimples for everyone!

2007-03-09T09:11:00.000-08:00

i don't really think or care about who my kids look like. as a matter of fact, it annoys me to no end when people pick apart their features. they are their own people. they look like THEM. they have their own special mix of genes and don't really look like anyone in particular. they have their own very distinct personalities. they are awesome and they are all their own.

but. dimples.

one of the few things i have always liked about myself and secretly hoped my kids would have. mia has them on the back of both shoulders (as do i) and gideon has a deep one right in the middle of his fat little right cheek (mine is on the left). do they look like me? no. do they look alike? no. but they have the dimples. and they have each other.

mia logic.

2007-03-06T14:47:00.000-08:00

mia: i have a question.
me: what's your question, mia?
mia: don't touch my stuff. what's my next question, mom?

mia: i have an idea.
me: what's your idea, mia?
mia: don't eat my snack.

bye, daddy.

2007-03-05T16:42:00.000-08:00

today was josh's first day back at work. our first day without daddy around to play, change diapers and help out. we were lonely but it actually went ok. and we even had to leave the house.

my first time leaving the house with 2 kids and we all returned home unscathed. we went to a dr. appt. downtown (which required a whole parking deal and multiple trips in the elevator) and a trip to the park. all before lunch. we even all got naps in before we started on household chores. pretty successful, i think. maybe not so fun for mia - but not terrible, either.

and josh? well the last time i talked to him he said that yes, of course he missed us, but it was much easier to be really busy at work than be at home with me and the kids. duh.

breastfeeding & weights / measurements

2007-03-04T21:05:00.000-08:00

i had been looking forward to breastfeeding again for the last couple months of my pregnancy. i enjoyed it so much with mia - the closeness, the quiet time, just her and i - and from the moment i weaned her at 15 months i wished i had waited a bit longer. there are things that she did just days old that she still does - it's pretty amazing to me how much she was already her own person (she used to grab my finger with her tiny hand and then make me hold her foot in my hand while she stretched her legs out - she still likes to do this 29 months later). that said, there are some things i had blocked from my memory. and they all came rushing back within the first day with gideon.

gideon latched on like a champ within 5 minutes. and didn't let go for 45 minutes. he ate and ate and ate every hour or so for the next 2 days. unfortunately, my milk didn't come in for 4 days. i had forgotten how quickly my nipples could blister, crack and bleed. and how long it would take for them to heal. as soon as it started happening it all came back to me, though. i was more braced for the pain and knew that as soon as my milk let it would be over. and it was. the last scabs (ew! scabs on my nipples!) fell off on day 5 and haven't returned since and it's been smooth sailing.

at gideon's 1 week check up they measured him at 22" (he didn't grow an inch in a week, they said the babies don't really stretch out completely at that first measurement and that this is his real birth measurement) and 9.1 lbs. - only 3 ounces less than at birth, which is great!

while we were there we had mia weighed and measured, too, and she came in (fully clothed) at 33" and 26 lbs. she finally seems to be really growing! of course gideon will probably be as heavy as her in no time at all.

i've fallen.

2007-02-27T21:40:00.000-08:00

i've fallen in love with another man. he's short and not very well spoken. he doesn't have much hair, has bad skin and is a bit cross-eyed. he's incontinent. he sleeps a lot. doesn't have a job. but oh...i can't help myself.

i knew i would love him. i've loved him for 10 months already. but to see him here, in my lap. watching him sleep, listening to his tiny snore...i'm a goner. and it's going by so quickly my heart hurts. he's not even 2 weeks old and things are already changing. his eyes are open more. focused more (even the lazy one!). he is starting to pay attention as i'm talking to him during diaper changings. and tonight, for the first time, he kept his eyes wide open while he nursed. soon he will be looking at me while he's eating and then my heart might just explode.

and can someone please explain to me just how they can possibly smell so good all the time? i know if i didn't bathe and pooped my pants all day i wouldn't smell that good.

settling into our new roles.

2007-02-27T21:25:00.000-08:00

we all have new roles in the house these days. old jobs we'd forgotten about and new ones we didn't know we'd have to take on. mia has had more adjustments to make than anyone (well...maybe not as much as gideon...) and she's been a star.

where josh and i have been getting used to breastfeeding, diaper changing and sleep deprivation mia has had to get used to sharing her parents, being out of school, a baby in mom's bed and having to use her "inside voice" more and more each passing day.

we were so worried that she was going to start acting out, insisting on sleeping in our bed, becoming more and more attached to one of us and being resentful of gideon. so far we haven't had to deal with too much. her sleep routine has shifted a bit - it takes her longer to settle into bed at night and she insists on napping in our bed during the day. but that's it. she is sweet as can be with gideon (when she remembers that he's here - he sleeps a LOT still) and is very understanding when we can't attend to her right away because we're busy with the baby or something else in the house.

of course...josh is still home full time. she still has attention from one of us pretty much whenever she wants. starting next week this could be a whole different ball game. please wish us luck.

induction, labor, birth, BABY!

2007-02-27T13:02:00.000-08:00

nearly 2 weeks ago i had a baby. what follows is a blow by blow of the induction, labor and (finally) birth of gideon eugene klapow:

02/14/07
12p – i check in at L&D for induction. starting to get nervous about it all – hoping it goes well. i give my urine sample, change into the gown and am hooked up to the monitors to watch the baby’s heart rate and my contractions. same story – i’m having contractions every 10-15 minutes, at some point they change to 5-10 minutes. strong but not strong enough to be too uncomfortable. and completely ineffective. they’ve been like this for weeks now.

1:30 – in goes the IV. holy hell this was a pain. yhe nurse has a nursing school resident following her today and she’s assured me that she’s pretty good at IVs and so she’s going to let her put mine in. i tell her that it’s ok but that i’m not overly thrilled with IVs anyway. it’s a good thing the primary nurse stayed in the room as the resident shot through my vein, tried to come back up and then wiggled that damned needle around for a while before the nurse made her take it out and applied tons of pressure to my arm so that i wouldn’t end up with a crazy bruise. and then they had to put it in again. and on that one they watched and watched, expecting my arm to fill up with fluid (it didn’t!). so far i’m not feeling all that comfortable with things…and of course josh is at my side, letting me squeeze the hell out of his hand and about to pass out. but he didn’t – and i’m totally surprised and impressed.

2p – they start pitocin and plan to up the dose every 30 minutes until things level off and start really working. josh leaves to go and get something to eat, check the dog, post to flickr, etc.

2:20 – a tech is called from the lab to take my blood samples. thank god.

2:30 – at this point i’m having more contractions but they’re not nearly as strong. i snuggle up in bed with some This American Life podcasts and take a quick nap.

4p – josh comes back just in time to unplug all my cords so that I can run to the bathroom. whew! as i’m in the bathroom the resident nurse comes in to turn up the pitocin (we’ve gone from 1-8 now). i will be locking the door on all future trips to the bathroom.

5p – josh sneaks me ½ a cliff bar to munch on and just as he hands it to me the nurses all walk in to check things and i’m forced to quickly hide my contraband before it is seized and i am reprimanded. josh is in the corner trying very hard not to laugh at me. I AM BORED.

6p – and now it’s 6. i’ve been on the pitocin for 4 hours now and it doesn’t really seem to be working. the nurse doesn’t seem to think that it’s odd but I’m getting nervous. after all, mia took 2 inductions. and by this time with the second try i was well into labor. not so much with this one. they’re not going to turn it up at this point, though. i’m having runs of contractions and the baby is decelerating a bit during them (normal) and they don’t want to “rocket the baby out”. so we just sit and wait and see. oh yeah, and i’m all kinds of swollen from the IV drip and sitting around. good times. josh is bummed he didn’t bring his Wii with him. And i’m so bored i’m letting him watch basketball. not looking like we need to worry about the possibility of a valentine’s day baby, though. and now Josh is on his way to rent a movie or two, get some dinner (that he had better not bring back and eat in front of me!) and maybe even post this to the blog.

7p - almost as soon as josh left my doctor showed up to check and see how things were going. by now they had upped the pitocin to "8.0" and my contractions were clustering up quite a bit. 3-4 big ones in a row and then a break. i still wasn't really feeling them any stronger, though. the doctor was pretty surprised by that and said something about how well i must tolerate pain. um...no. and then they noticed that the baby wasn't really liking all the contractions together like that so they decided to stop the pitocin for a while and let me eat. before she had the words out of her mouth i was on the phone to josh requesting mass amounts of food. you know, to add to the dinner they were going to feed me in the hospital. who knew when they would offer me food again?! and so the pitocin stayed off for a couple hours and we stuffed ourselves.

9p - back on the pitocin now and we try to watch a movie. but we're both so drained from the long day we've had that we decide to try and nap instead. it's here when the tired really hits me. i start crying and crying. i'm so tired and so disappointed at how things are going. but soon enough i calm down and we sleep.

02/15/07
12a or so - my doctor calls to give us a couple options. we can either keep trying with the induction and probably have to deliver with another doctor (she stops being on call at 8am) or we can go home first thing in the morning and come back on friday (the 17th). josh and i look at each other and know right away that there is no other option for us. we're not leaving. there is no way we are going to leave after all this time only to have to start over again on friday morning. so we push on. back to napping. if only the nurses did come in every 30 minutes to up the pitocin, check my blood pressure, etc.

4a - after catching maybe 3 total hours of sleep i watch josh sleep and wait for 5am to roll around so that i can get up and take a shower - josh should really get as much sleep as possible. after all, after i have the baby he's going to have to take care of mia while i rest in the hospital.

4:45a - the nurses come in to check my cervix and up the pitocin yet again. i tell them that i'm going to take all my monitors off for a few mintues and take a shower and they tell me - get this - that i "can't". ha! i tell them that i can and i will be taking a shower now, thank you. so they turn off the pitocin, huff and puff and go away for a while. the shower is beyond relaxing and gets me ready to start another day of induction. here we go again. and this time i'm 3cm dilated!

5:30a - shift change. the new nurses come on and the lead nurse tells me that i seem grumpy. huh? poor josh, he knew i was going to lose it. and i do. i had been in the hospital for over 17 hours at that point. little to no sleep. so yeah, lady, i'm grumpy. we did not start off on the right foot.

8a - the on call doctor shows up for rounds. she checks me and verifies that i am 3cm dilated and that my cervix is soft - but very high. she offers to break my water and get things moving. but i decline. as silly as it sounds, i'm afraid of the pain. my cervix is so tender on a regular day and the average cervical exam is very painful for me. i'm not really looking to have a crochet hook set up there. besides, my water broke on it's own with mia. sure, it took a long time, but it broke. and we've already been here a long time. i can tell she thinks i'm making a mistake but she doesn't try to push me.

11a - after another 3 hours of unsuccesful induction and another crying jag (or 2) i finally ask for the doctor to return and break my water.

1:30p - the doctor shows up and checks me, still at 3cm. i brace myself and in she goes with the crochet hook to break my water. it is as uncomfortable as i thought it was going to be but it's over fairly quickly. gush! it's the same as i remember it from when i had mia. like peeing your pants - sudden and warm. and such a relief. the contractions are instantly worse. the difference between the contractions with and without the bag of water is crazy. all those women out there that labor without relief to the end? you have my utmost respect. that shit is crazy painful. after 15 minutes i ask for the epidural.

2:10p - the anesthesiologist arrives with the drugs - woo hoo! my epidural with mia was quick and painless. over before i knew it began. i told the doc he had big shoes to fill as i expected the same treatment. unfortunately it went about as well as my IV placement. 2 tries and 20 minutes before it was done. more than the discomfort of getting the needles and whatnot in right i remember my water continuing to flow. with every contraction i had it felt like my water was breaking all over again. i told the nurse it seemed like a lot - that i wasn't sure whether or not i actually was peeing myself. she told me it was normal and i know she thought i was exaggerating. well after 20 minutes of water gushing out she went to clean me up and was blown away by the lake i was sitting in. it was pretty gross. and not at all warm by that point. but in a matter of minutes i couldn't feel it anymore.

3p - all cleaned up and feeling numb i settle in for the rest of the waiting game. they keep the pitocin on for about an hour to make sure that the contractions keep up at a steady pace. and once they turn it off the contractions stop all together. grr. so back on the pitocin i go.

4p - our friend, lisa, brings mia by for a visit. she's a little wary of all the tubes and the hospital in general but is soon acting like her normal weird self. crawling all over me and asking for a snack. she gives me lots of hugs and tells the baby to get out already so we can meet him/her. and within 20 minutes she's telling josh that she's "ready to leave the hospital now" and lisa takes her away. it's now that i realize that soon (no, really!) we will have another one here. soon mia really will be a big sister. not in theory but in reality. she will have to share us. we will have to share her. soon we'll be parents again. soon i will have to try and push a potentially HUGE baby out of my body. ah! the nurses tell us not to expect anything for another 4 hours and josh decides he needs a nap.

5p - the nurses come in to check me and holy moly i'm at 7cm! hooray! they are still convinced that it will be another 3 hours before go time, though.

6p - my epidural this time around is dramatically different than it was with mia. so much better. i can feel my legs. i can feel all of my contractions. not in the way that they are painful - just in that i can feel my muscles tightening and i know where they are focusing their efforts. and thank god i can feel them this time because i know that things have moved quickly. i call the nurse in and tell her that the baby is ready. i can feel the contractions in my rear end. please check me already. and i'm right. the baby is right there. it's time to push. they run out of the room, grab me a mirror and call the doctor. and we start the pushing game. i have let the nurses know that there will be no cheering on their part. no overly enthusiastic "way to go!"s, please. they roll their eyes a bit but agree. the mirror is awesome. a little shocking at first - but just amazing. and really, really helpful. between the lightish epidural and the mirror i can feel and see just what i need to do in order to get the baby out. i honestly didn't even think about how big s/he could be once i started pushing - just that i needed to push. i could see the muscles working and then i could see the baby. amazing. i reached down and felt his head - so squishy and wet - the strangest thing i've ever felt. and then i pushed again and the head was out. i could feel the relief in my body. another push and and the body slipped out. it was over. and it was all beginning. and i heard the words, from josh, for the first time "it's a boy". this is where i am so proud of josh. he fought against himself and watched the baby being born. how he didn't pass out i'll never know but i'm so glad he was able to share in watching our son join us.

6:47p - they laid him immediately on my chest and josh cut the cord. they did what they needed to do with him (eye goop and whatnot) while he was still on my chest, i delivered and got to view my placenta and then everyone left the room. we were left alone with a nursing baby for just over an hour. he nursed well and immediately for 45 minutes. right away i couldn't imagine him not being with me. was he ever really inside me? when they finally did do weights and measures he came in at 9 lbs 4 oz and 21 inches long. how in the hell did i manage that? and how was it easier than with mia? crazy.

so there you go - we have a son, Gideon Eugene. and he's amazing.

tomorrow is a big day.

2007-02-13T20:38:00.000-08:00

yes, tomorrow is valentine's day. never a big hit with me. never. hate it. ugh. but! mia's got a pizza party tomorrow at school (her first pizza party - how cool is it that she's grown up enough for a pizza party?) and she's beyond excited. pizza!! party!! school!!

and.

they're inducing me tomorrow at noon. we're actually going to have another baby. crazy.

today mia woke up her usual happy self and came to snuggle with me in bed before abandoning me for hot milk and barney (some things are just bigger than mom, you know). after josh took her to school he came home and we spent a couple hours lounging around the house and playing zelda. seeing as how i was up with insomnia from 3-5 i even got to sleep in a little late. then we enjoyed a nice vietnamese lunch and a little shopping before picking mia up again. we headed to the hospital for one last non-stress test and then out to our last dinner as "just 3".

there were a lot of "lasts" this weekend and today. i just tucked mia into bed as an only child for the last time. sang her the songs that have been just hers for the last time (as she'll have to share them soon). one last ride in the car with just one full carseat. one last night without a baby. this is the last night with my big baby belly. the last night i'll feel the baby kicking and squirming about on the inside of me. probably the last night i will ever be pregnant again. which is kind of freaking me out as i truly love being pregnant. even when it's really really hard? it's just as wonderful. and i'll never get to do it again.

of course i also finally get to meet this little person who has been causing me so much trouble. seriously? stretchmarks? your sister didn't think it was necessary to give me stretchmarks. did i do something to offend or embarass you already? probably, yes. and what's with the possibility of you being so big?! there is one side of our little family square that has big people. one. and you had to pull from that gene pool?

there are also a lot of "firsts" around here. tomorrow will be the first time that mia sleeps without us - and the first time that i sleep without her. her first sleepover at a friends house! and when she wakes up on thursday (or at least by the end of the day)? she'll be a big sister. that's huge.

and josh and i will be parents to two children. huh? how did that happen? we were just 20 years old the other day and suddenly it's 11 years later and we're married with two kids. and the time only seems to go by faster each day.

pregnancy - 41 weeks and counting

2007-02-10T04:04:00.000-08:00

first, here are some pictures from last weekend. the belly, it's taken over.

at a week past due the doctor starts you on non-stress tests to watch the baby's heart rate and make sure that your fluid levels are ok on a regular basis - that started yesterday. the baby looks good. so good, in fact, that s/he's decided that s/he doesn't ever want to come out. just like mia. what is it with these stubborn babies of mine? i don't know where they could get that. sheesh! my contraction pattern is steady all the time but unfortunately it's not doing anyone a lick of good. i have not progressed at all and things aren't looking good for a natural start to this labor. we're talking induction and/or c-section these days. it's good to have a plan going because honestly? i don't think i can handle this pregnancy much longer.

physically i'm just beat down. i feel, literally, as though i've been kicked in the crotch all day long. i have a hard time finding my balance when i stand up. the stretch marks are running a wicked race along the front of my belly and starting to actually hurt. i can't sleep at night and end up napping for hours and hours during the day. i am swollen from head to toe. all this and i know that i'm going to miss my pregnant belly. how is that even possible? oh, and as of today the dosctors are measuring the baby (+/- a pound and a half) at 9.4. HA!

emotionally there are days when all i can do is cry and nap. nap and cry. i'm so tired and uncomfortable now i don't want to move and all of these things are adding to my general depression. depressed about still being pregnant, having to go through induction again, not being able to really keep up with mia, and other various things that have nothing to do with anything. good lord it's time to move on to the next stage in the hormone roller coaster! and that's scaring the crap out of me, too. much to my surprise i didn't get ppd with mia. i was totally expecting it as i was being treated for depression when i got pregnant and was a (normal) hormonal mess while pregnant. but it never came. this time around i'm much more, shall we say, sensitive at this point and it's got me worried. after all, i didn't have to worry about a toddler the first time around. and newborns? they're a cake walk compared to a toddler.

i'm worried about what kind of mother i'm going to be to two children. right now i'm already so much more and less of the mother i thought i would be. all at the same time. does that make sense? there are things i never thought i would be able to handle and there are days when i catch myself doing things i swore i never would. but just how am i going to manage two? two who will be completely different. require me to switch gears all day long? will i be able to be the mom/teacher/playmate that mia needs while she's home with me on maternity leave? will i be able to recognize everything the new baby needs while handling mia? and will i get lost in the shuffle and forget to take care of myself this time around? and josh and i just seemed to fall back into our own relationship - will it take another two years to find each other? all these things have me up at night.

i can't wait to meet this new little person. really. and i already can't imagine having made the choice not to have another child. but still. i'm scared. and most days i just want MY mommy.

39w6d and bored.

2007-02-02T08:09:00.000-08:00

according to the doctor i'm 1cm dilated and 75% effaced. which is more dilated than i was with mia at this point so that's something, i guess. but i've gained significantly more. at 40 weeks with mia i had only gained 28 lbs. this time around i have already gained 39. and i can feel it. i'm really not sure how i haven't broken a hip or tipped right over.

anyway...i'm bored, people. bored to tears. not bored enough to keep mia home with me, of course. no point in both of us being bored all day. and not bored enough to tackle the piles of laundry building up behind me. or bored enough to walk the dog (what? it's cold!). but bored enough to complain about it and then find something to eat while finishing up the blanket i started nearly 2 years ago. at least i'm getting something done, right? i was having more braxton hicks last night as i lay in bed so i started to visualize things progressing. but then i got bored and fell asleep.

so here i sit (while bouncing on my yoga ball), bigger than big, drinking double amounts of raspberry leaf tea to "tone my uterus" and waiting. just waiting.

potty training and big kids and chicken suits, oh my!

2007-01-29T08:01:00.000-08:00

mia has completed her first week in the "big kid" class and begun full time potty training. we were so worried that she would feel overwhelmed by it all and that the potty training might freak her out a bit. we should know better than to worry about her by now.

at the end of her first day she was stoked about the big kid class and all the new things she had to do and play with. she even knew a handful of kids in the class from her old class. and the best part (for us, at least)? she hasn't had one accident since the potty training began. not one. not at school, not at home, not even on the weekend. and she's only woken up wet twice in the last week. it's really pretty amazing.

one of her favorite teachers sent home a card for her that said "thank you for being socially competant". there must have been a mixup at the hospital, right? :) hee.

she's also becoming more insistent on what she wears and how her hair is done (or in most cases simply not done). last night she went to bed in pajamas and a pullup per normal and played and giggled in her bed for 10 minutes or so. when i went to check on her before heading to bed i damn near peed myself. she had stipped naked (including her pullup) and had replaced her pajamas with her favorite outfit - her chicken suit. she let me put the pullup back on but there was no way in hell she was going to let me remove the chicken suit without a fight, so i didn't. this morning she woke up so proud of herself. she was still a chicken! and a chicken with dry pants!

Impending fatherhood

2007-01-23T14:21:00.000-08:00

**originally written by josh just before mia changed our lives. thank you, mom, for holding onto this for me.

I don't write too much about the fact that I'm going to be a dad in the next couple months, not because I'm not excited or anything like that, but mostly because it's an experience so many others have gone through that I don't think it would be all that interesting to anyone else. And really, I don't have much to say beyond "I'm excited." I imagine it will be quite a shock when that baby finally pops and I'm suddenly a dad, but dads don't bond till the baby's out, moms have 9+ months of bonding before there's a baby in the world. I've prepared myself the best way I know how and try to take advantage of the time to myself I know I won't have come BIRTHday. But really, it's hard to think about anything other than the pregnant wife, as I won't have any idea what my baby will be like until s/he's out. And the pregnant wife is quite a lot to think about and if I stop thinking about the pregnant wife I'll surely be reminded in the next two minutes. I suppose that, in a way, taking care of a pregnant wife is akin to taking care of a child. They are not shy about talking about bodily functions, they are unruly, impatient, seem to always have a booboo, need lots of love, always asking for something, blah blah blah. So that there is a preparation of sorts and a way of bonding with the baby in a six degrees of seperation kind of way. The baby needs me because my wife needs me. But it's a role sort of akin to a personal assistant to the bonding executive. I even have paperwork to complete, like daycare apps, finance papers for the babysafe car, and family leave forms. I'm certain it will all be worth it. My wife is hurting and impatient but all we both really want is to start being parents. The baby is a reward for enduring the punishment of pregnancy. I really believe that pregnancy is a punishment. As much as I know my wife loves me, pregnancy is hard on her emotionally and physically and incredibly hard on a relationship. Before pregnancy, a certain amount of selfishness in a relationship is perfectly acceptable. Pregnancy starts to break that down, codepency is no longer a psychological concept. My wife really needs me to help her physically and emotionally and I need her to prepare me to become a dad and that comes in the form of feeling the thumps from the lump (feeling the belly) and doing household projects to prepare. Following pregnancy, and I'm only guessing here, we become parents and the codependency shifts from her and I needing each other to the baby needing us. I am certain this will be more rewarding and for that I am truly excited. So come on baby, let's enjoy the fruits of mama's labor (pun intended)!

there's a lot of growing up going on these days.

2007-01-23T09:01:00.000-08:00

things are really changing in our lives these days. especially for mia. she's growing up so fast, it seems. it must be really hard for her to handle all of the changes going on in and around her. some days (like yesterday...dear lord, thank you for putting yesterday behind us...) i think we get a glimpse into her teenage years. and i'm scared.

she's still a baby in so many ways but then she turns her head just so and says something completely adult and i realize how big she really is. she's nearly 2 and a half. she wants to be swaddled after her baths and rocked before bed time. but god help you if you try to help her into her seat for dinner or help her get her shoes on. "I CAN DO IT!!" when she's tired because she missed her nap (which she obviously didn't need, oh noooo...) she just cries and cries with the tired. telling me that she just needs to cry a little bit. and i know just how she feels. poor kid. at least she can tell lme how she's feeling these days - i've been waiting for that for a long time. to have a peek inside her crazy little head.

and today? today she's moving into the "big kid class". they're moving her up 2 months before she's scheduled because she's so "mature". just a couple weeks before she becomes a big sister. a couple weeks before she is pulled out of daycare until june. she's leaving behind all of her friends that she's known for the past year to join a class of kids that are much older, bigger and crazier than her.

AND! potty training. full on, no more pull-ups potty training. as of this morning my baby is a full time panty wearing little girl. and it's killing me a little.

as i got her ready for school this morning we were talking about her first day in her new class and she got this look on her face like she might cry. i asked her if she was nervous and she sat down on my lap and told me very matter of factly that "yes, mama, i'm nervous". and then she giggled and put on her big girl care bear panties, made sure her name was written in them and smiled the biggest smile you've ever seen. she was so proud of herself.

josh dropped her off this morning and said that she was a little overwhelmed but didn't cry. but i did.

pregnancy - 37w 4d

2007-01-17T10:56:00.000-08:00

i went in today with really high hopes that things had progressed. i'd been having more and more intense braxton hicks contractions and my pelvis feels like it's being split open. good signs!

but no. nothing has progressed. and because the baby gave me a break in the pain and movements today the doctor gave me another ultrasound to make sure that the baby hadn't flipped into a breech position. it hasn't. it is, however, at an angle into my pelvis on the right side. just like mia was. and i haven't progressed at all.

i was told that the baby would not be coming this week and to get out and walk. at which point i had to try very hard not to burst into tears. i honestly don't know why i'm so obsessed with getting the baby out. other than being uncomfortable and fearing for a huge baby, i mean. it's just not ready yet - i just have to keep telling myself that. sure, i might be ready, but that means nothing. bah.

oh, and i gained another 3 lbs. since last week. damnit all to hell. not gonna stop me from stuffing my face with indian food at lunch, though.

panty watch.

2007-01-17T09:04:00.000-08:00

seems like my whole life since the time i was 12 has revolved around the state of my underwear.

you spend all this time waiting to get your first period. and then it's here and you become obsessed with making sure you don't spot through your clothes at school. nothing is more terrible.

then you have the years where you are not ready to have a baby so you're constantly checking to make sure that you've started your period.

and then you make the jump to being ready to start a family and spend the next few years crying every time you start your period.

then you get pregnant and pray each day that you will not start spotting. "please don't let there be any blood" every time you go to the bathroom.

and now i'm at the point in my pregnancy where i'm hoping to see blood again. "please let there be some sign that this is coming to an end. bloody show - where are you?!"

but it's not just my panties i'm watching these days. mia's joining the panty watch party next week with full blown potty training. that's right. no more pull ups - panties only.

it's all panties, all the time around here, i tell ya.

josh here reporting post baby shower

2007-01-16T14:25:00.000-08:00

So it's not unusual that I have someone call me over to discuss a computer problem in our sales office so I thought nothing of it when I got a call summoning me to one of the salesperson's office to fix a computer problem she could not explain. It was unusual to be pointed in the direction of the conference room when i knew full well that this salesperson did not work in the conference room. It was downright shocking to see all my fellow employees standing around a cake with a pretty yellow tablecloth and duckies adorning said table. And the shock had to be noticed by all in the room because I could feel the blood rushing to my cheeks and I literally could not speak or process that my co-workers were throwing a baby shower for me.

I really thought I was invited there for someone else's birthday party but everyone was staring at me so eventually it sunk in that all these duckies were for me. It was shocking on a number of different levels. First, I'm a dude, so all modern conventions aside where it's not unusual for there to be co-ed baby showers, it is certainly not the norm. Secondly, I rarely socialize with my co-workers and over four years working here I have never received anything more than a card when my birthday rolls around. This last point is mainly of my own doing, I just am not a real social guy at work.

So all in all, they completely surprised me and I'm certain I was terrible at showing my gratitude because I'm just terrible at saying thank you properly but I think they got the point that I was pleasantly surprised.

just in time...

2007-01-15T08:30:00.000-08:00

...for it to not be ok. mia, the kid who could not sleep in our bed not because we didn't want her to but because she would want to play and giggle and poke us in the eyes? wants to (and can) sleep in our bed. she has crawled into our bed the past 3 days and then gone back to sleep for over an hour each time. which is great in that she's sleeping longer. but not so great in that we have a queen and soon will have a little one in there for her to squish and be jealous of.

and what are we going to tell her? that there's only room enough for the baby? that's just awful. but i don't want to tell her she can't climb into bed with us for her last hour of sleep in the morning, either. i've been waiting 2 years for her to snuggle with me in bed. can't win, i tell ya.

in other news, i'm still pregnant. which i should be, i suppose, as i'm only 37 weeks along. but still. the increasing braxton hicks and trouble getting around have grown old. AND (this one is for all of you haters out there - you know who you are) i got my first stretch mark. it's little and not too dark (yet) but it's still there. right smack in the middle of my belly.

i've just been a bit of an emotional wreck this weekend. no c-section - hooray! but possible huge baby which could then lead to a c-section. crap! also, i am really excited and anxious to begin labor on my own this time. i didn't get to do it with mia and feel like i missed so much. of course, they'll probably want to induce me soon if i don't start progressing since they think the baby is big. and i really don't want that at all. and round and round it goes in my head until i just end up on the couch in a heap. crying for no reason and telling mia that no, i'm not sad, i got an owie but i'll be ok. stupid hormones and fake contractions giving me hope of delivering early.

but anyway...

we've begun to get things even more ready around the house. bought a crazy huge amount of diapers and wipes, there's the baby meds we might need, the lotions and creams i'm sure we'll need, etc. and today? today we shop for snacks. i plan to fill the cupboards with things to snack on so i won't have to either leave the house or cook for a while. hell, i should do that anyway as i neither like to leave the house or cook - new baby or not.

news is good.

2007-01-10T12:14:00.000-08:00

so! the doctor just called and there is no sign of placenta previa! which means no scheduled c-section.

also, the baby is measuring at 7.2 lbs. holy wow. that's about what mia weighed when she was born at 42w 5d. holy mother. so i've been ordered to "get up and walk and get that baby out of there before it gets much bigger." and that's what i'll do, i guess. walk, clean, hell, jump up and down if i need to.

everybody together now - "get out, baby!"

no news is no news.

2007-01-10T11:50:00.000-08:00

36w 4d and nothing to tell. had an appt. this morning and expected to hear the results of the ultrasound from monday but they hadn't recieved the results yet. they're supposed to call me with the results of those today, though.

what she could tell me is that i'm not quite 1cm dilated and my cervix is soft. and that she guesses that the baby is about 7lbs already. now we all know how guesses go but i still have at least 3 weeks to go - ah! i sure hope they call with the baby's actual measurements soon.

oh, and i'm 136lbs. 33 lbs gained so far.

pregnancy - 36 weeks

2007-01-09T12:07:00.000-08:00

we had another set of ultrasounds yesterday to check on the baby's size and the palcenta's location but we won't know anything for certain until tomorrow. so why am i even bothering with this post, you might ask? well so that i can show you one of the two most beautiful babies in the world, that's why. i give you, el-bow:

as you can see s/he has the same lips and cheeks as mia already. and those are some pretty good parts, you know!

and then there's me. the carrier. how am i doing, you ask? i. am. done. i'm anxious to get this show on the road. i'm tired and uncomfortable and none of my clothes have fit for weeks now.

yesterday the ultrasound tech said that she "couldn't see" my placenta. which is good in that it's most likely moved out of the way of my cervix and so i won't have to have a c-section (again, we won't know that until tomorrow) but on the other hand - shouldn't she have seen it somewhere? i mean, we know it's in there, so where is it, exactly? doesn't give me too much confidence in her and i'm thinking that we might have to go back in for another round of ultrasounds. bah.

i got all worked up and upset about the possibility of having a scheduled c-section but after a few weeks and as i grew more and more uncomfortable the idea kind of grew on me. i would know when it was coming. i could take some time off beforehand without worrying that i was going to go really late again. it would be over soon! but now i'm back to square one. and having to reaquaint myself with the thought that this baby could be in here for a while and i can't plan a thing. but it's good. natural is better than an operation. i know that. but still. i'm done.

i do think that the baby will come out sooner rather than later, though. with mia i wasn't uncomforatble at all, really. i mean, i was huge and swollen but i wasn't really all that put out being pregnant. not this time. i feel the baby down low - much lower than i ever did with mia. my braxton hicks have been picking up over the past couple days and come this weekend i'll be "at term" and can safely have the baby. so maybe this one will be just as we thought and be the "anti-mia". in that it will come early and be a completely different kind of newborn. the good and the bad all rolled into one.

and how's mia handling this all, you ask? splendidly. we've set up the nursery complete with the swing, bouncy chair, baby toys, blankets, etc. and mia is in heaven. she has been playing quietly in the baby's room every day now. i'll find her all wrapped up in a blanket, bouncing in the bouncy seat and playing with a rattle. it really is sweet. and yes, it's a little weird and she might have a hard time adjusting at first but really? the baby can't play with most of these things for months anyway and mia has decided that it's her job to teach the baby how to do certain things. namely: how to sit up and how to play with it's toys. she's told me that she will help with diapers and give the baby lots of kisses. she asks us every day "is the baby coming?"

yesterday she could see the baby's face clearly in the ultrasound and it hit her a little more that there was a baby in there. she spent the rest of the day hugging and kissing the belly and watching it move. and last night every time she thought i was uncomfortable or in pain she would pat my shoulder and ask oh so sweetly "oh mama, the baby's moving?" i love that kid.

of course she's not all sunshine and rainbows right now - don't get me wrong. she's fully embracing the twos with all her might and has been standing her ground on things a lot more. she's also been a bit more emotional than we're used to. especially when she's tired. the other night she got to crying about something and couldn't calm down so she put her head on my belly and told me that she would "just cry a little bit, mama, ok?" and so she did. and then she was better. sometimes it just feels better to cry.

so yeah, i think she's gonna be just fine. sure, it might take a while and there will be bouts of jealousy, but that's normal and expected.

more bits

2007-01-04T13:00:00.000-08:00

is it? - mia's new thing. she will tell you what something is: "the hat is purple, mama" and then, a second later, will say "is it, mama? is the hat purple?" she does this for everything. confirming that she was right in the first place and showing off her new questioning skills. her growing sentence structures really are amazing.

for the love of baby - mia now has 3 baby dolls. a cabbage patch kid ("big baby"), a regular baby ("other big baby") and a cabbage patch newborn ("little baby"). she insists that they all sleep with her and they take turns riding in the stroller. at least one of them always has a poopy diaper (which is weird since mia never has a poopy diaper) and they all need hot milk in their bottles. all day long. she is so ready for the real baby to get her. she asks me every day if the baby is coming. and when? wednesday? no, not wednesday, mia. but soon.

we've started preparing the nursery and have taken out old clothes and toys for washing. yesterday she took a teething ring out of the nursery and told me "this is for me, i'll take this home now." um, ok...when i told her what it was she put it back. she didn't want to play with anything that was meant for the baby to chew on, i guess.

but she's doing really well considering all the change in the house. she made me lie her down in the crib so she could stare at the mobile "like the baby" and giggled because she is obviously too big for a crib now. she told me all about her big bed and then went on to tell josh and i all the things she's going to teach the new baby to do when it gets here. like sit. and play.

she's gonna be an awesome big sister.

holiday review

2007-01-04T12:27:00.000-08:00

whew, it's over! ok, i really shouldn't start it out like that, should i? it really wasn't so bad - i'm just tired and cranky and huge. it was actually a nice and mellow holiday season in our house this year. the last one for a long time, i'm guessing.

hanukkah!
mia's first realy hanukkah. sure, she was around last year but she didn't really know what the hell was going on and we were all sleep deprived what with having a 3 month old and all. so! this year josh's family made the trip to our house and we ate and ate and ate. at least i did. mia had (and loved) her first latkes. thank god. what would we do if she didn't eat them? oh yes, we would have had more for us. but the kid who doesn't really like potatos is starting to come around.

when we started lighting the candles she was all sorts of confused. she knew there were presents involved at some point (and had been very patient about it), mom had made a cake, and now there were candles. so far so good. and people were starting to sing! but wait. that's not happy birthday - what the hell is going on?! seriously, the look on her face as she looked at everyone singing the prayers was hysterical. like this was some great big joke and she had better get to open those presents, damnit!

and she did. and how. can you say spoiled? she didn't even get any presents from josh and i that night because, well, she didn't need them. her babi and zadi and aunt tracey and uncle adam took care of her, i tell you what.

but more than the presents she was so excited to have her cousins in the house. we don't see them nearly enough and they're really really great boys. at 12 and 10 you'd think they would get bored pretty quickly with a bossy 2 year old, right? nope, they played with her for 4 hours. she bossed them all around and showed off her room. they giggled and chased and she was in love. she still asks me nearly every day where they are and tells me she misses them.

the rest of the rest of the week was really low key and we didn't go anywhere. every night we lit candles after dinner and every night mia would light them and then bask in their glow for about 10 seconds. as though she was really soaking in the moment. and then she would turn and ask "presents now?" she caught on quick, that one.

what really struck me was that she was able to keep hanukkah and christmas straight in her head somehow. we've had the christmas and hanukkah decorations up since thanksgiving and there were even 1 or 2 presents under the tree. we told her once that she had to wait until christmas to open those presents and that seemed to be enough. she never really asked about them. sure, she would poke at them every now and again, but then we would hear her tell herself "wait 'til christmas." and put it back. hopefully this will continue.

christmas!!
for the first time in 5 years we didn't go back to albuquerque for christmas this year. i was too pregnant and mia isn't free anymore :( but you know what? it was really nice having our very first christmas alone. and our last christmas with just mia.

growing up, i hated how my dad woke us all up at 5:30 in the morning by banging pots together and making all sorts of other ridiculous noises. we still try and keep him under control when we visit. but now i sort of understand. josh and i were up at 5:30 laying in bed waiting for mia to wake up. she wakes up consistently between 6 and 6:30 every. single. day. so at 6 we got up and started the day. made coffee, started some food, checked the internet, did dishes (complete with pot banging), turned on some music, etc. then it was 7. then 7:30. the hell?!

finally, she came into the hallway and found us waiting for her like paparrazi with the cameras and the loud voices. we got some crazy dirty looks! until she saw the presents under the tree behind us. then it was game on.

i wish josh had gotten a picture of her opening her stocking because that was the one thing i don't really think she was prepared for. presents in the already cool oversized sock grandma had made for her. score!

and in the end she got all she really wanted. panties and a baby stroller. and then she was done with us.

new years! and uncle ben!

mia has been carrying around this 1st grade photo of her uncle ben for weeks now. she sleeps with it. it's her uncle ben. not mine. and certainly not yours. so there. so when he told us he was coming for a visit mia was beside herself. telling me that uncle ben was going to chase her and tickle her and sleep in her room. end of discussion.

i kind of worried that she would be let down when uncle ben showed up and wasn't a first grader any more but was, instead, a tall 17 year old man. a man! (hell, sometimes i'm disappointed that he's not a 1st grader anymore). but no. she was SO excited. she talked his ear off and made him play with her non-stop. and lucky ben - his flight got bumped for an extra 2 days because of the snow in denver!!

they had the most fun and she is so bummed that he's not still here. she wants to call him every day but alas, whenever we call he is either sleeping or not there. damned teenagers! and seriously, how cute are these two?

pregnancy - 34 weeks

2006-12-26T10:54:00.000-08:00

ok, so. overall assessment at my 34 week check up? i'm HUGE. i know, surprise, surprise.

i'm at 133 lbs. - which is a 30 lb weight gain (what i gained total in 43 weeks with mia). and then there's my belly. my fundal height at my last check was 33cm (up from 32 2 weeks prior). today? at 34 weeks? it's at 37. so i get to add a couple more things to my ultrasound check in 2 weeks. they will now be checking my placenta location, guessing the baby's size (and we all know how accurate that nonsense is, right?) and checking for extra amniotic fluid (which they did with mia and i didn't have. and my doc doesn't think that i have this problem anyway as she can feel all the arms and legs and elbows on this kid easily). so there you go. HUGE.

and i have 6 weeks to go and a fridge full of christmas dinner leftovers. there's no point in holding back now, is there? no, i didn't think so. here i come, pie!

pregnancy - 32 weeks

2006-12-11T11:57:00.000-08:00

so here we are at week 32 with nothing really new to report. the little bugger is constantly on the move. my bowels are not. nor is my placenta. it's still lying really low and the doctor told us today that unless it moves 2 more centimeters out of the way in the next month she would feel more comfortable scheduling a c-section than risking an abruption of the placenta. so. there's that.

BUT - i only gained 2 lbs. this go round. putting me at 129. total weight gain so far - 26 lbs.

isn't pregnancy fun?!

pregnancy / baby related

2006-12-05T10:20:00.000-08:00

less than 9 weeks to go, people! up until recently (this week, even) i've enjoyed this pregnancy. knowing it will probably be my last is part of that - making it as special in every way as my first. i find that i've forgotten a lot of what mia did while on the inside. did she kick this much? she certainly wasn't up at night like this one is. and i definately wasn't this big, was i? and so i'm trying to remember as much as i can about this little one. this little one who will be here so very soon.

but i'm done now. i'm huge and getting uncomfortable fast. i'm not sleeping well. i'm constipated. i'm huge.

mia is going to be a big sister. and a great one, i'm assuming. you know, because she's so awesome at everything else. she's been happy to talk about the baby, kiss/hug and sing to the belly, help me prepare the nursery, etc. and she'll tell anyone who asks all about the baby in my belly. but still it's really abstract. we don't know anyone with a newborn. she doesn't really know anyone with siblings, either. so who knows how this will all work out.

yesterday we were looking at photos of a friend of ours who recently gave birth to a beautiful baby girl and i think some of the reality hit mia. she was looking at photos of her friend (who is almost 3) and this new little baby. and the mama without a baby belly (what happened there?). when i explained it all to her her eyes got really wide like suddenly all the pieces fit together. we would be getting a little baby like that too, wouldn't we?

the rest of the day she was in and out of the nursery admiring her old digs. she took notice of the blanket and pillow that has been sitting on the glider for 2 years now (thanks, maggie!). she hasn't looked at them since we stopped nursing at 15 months and yesterday she had to thoroughly inspect them both, have me wrap her up, put the pillow on my belly and we rocked. and sang.

she'll always be my baby but soon she'll be a big sister, too. and that makes me sad. sad that she'll have to be and "example" that she'll be expected to be more mature and sad that we won't have as much cuddle time for a while.

but damn she's gonna be a good big sister, i can just feel it. she's such a good helper and a lover. and who wouldn't love to have mia as a sibling? she's so much fun!

and on to pregnancy news:

at the last checkup i was 30 weeks along and had packed on another 8 lbs in the 5 weeks since my last appt. sigh... i had an ultrasound and my placenta is still low-lying but not blocking my cervix. so i have a 50% chance of a "normal" delivery for now. we'll see what happens in the next month and whether or not we'll have to schedule a c-section. wish me luck that we don't have to do that. just the thought makes me want to cry. the loss of an active labor, the surgery and recovery from it, and not being able to grab hold of and nurse my baby right away. it's all too much to think about right now so instead i'll give you a look at the baby (the baby who does not like having a profile shot taken so you get the creepy view).

disney! thanksgiving!

2006-11-30T09:02:00.000-08:00

this year we spent our thanksgiving vacation in socal visiting disneyland and friends. and oh my god - it was the best thanksgiving vacation ever! we might just have to make a tradition out of it.

monday mia and i hung out with 2 great friends and their daughters at an outdoor shopping center. they were nice enough to bring a baby stroller for mia to push her cabbage patch doll around in. holy crap did she ever love that thing! she was very serious about it, too. she kept stopping to throw up the sunshade and check on her baby. then she'd throw it back down and be on her way again. all she has talked about since we left is that stroller. guess what she'll be getting this christmas?

the next day was a day of rest for all of us and we had a bite to eat with josh's highschool friend (who mia fell instantly in love with and keeps referring to as "my adam") before taking a long nap. then we took a dip in the freezing cold pool (because we promised mia we would) and quickly traded it in for a warm bubble bath in our room. we finished our night off with ice cream, where mia discovered the joy of a sugar cone for the first time and quickly stole my cone.

wednesday we were off to disneyland ("mickey's house!") with more friends. now, mia doesn't know disney from any other character on tv so there wasn't any worry about her being let down at not being able to see it all but there also wasn't that crazed excitement, either. both good things, in my opinion. i was concerned that there wouldn't really be a lot for her to do once we got inside the park (as far as rides go) but i was SO wrong. she could ride almost everything (as could i) and there was so much for her to just look at that it made the trip more than worthwhile.

her favorite ride (and she loved the rides) was the tram to and from the parking lot. had we only known! she got her own pair of ears with her name on them - she had been asking for them all day long and when we finally got her a pair she wouldn't wear them for much more than pictures. but the pictures, they're cute :)

the one thing she could have done without was the posing with giant cartoon characters. she was fine with them being across the street from her but we kept thrusting her into close contact with them. there was clawing and escape attempts and damn near tears. she now hates every character we made her touch. the others are all still on her good list.

we didn't have plans for thanksgiving when we got to town (we were hoping to visit with family but it didn't work out) but were invited to spend the evening with friends of ours. what a fantastic night that was! an awesome dinner, great company, good kids, no stress - it was perfect. thanks again for having us, guys!

so yeah, we had a really wonderful thanksgiving. and one final trip with mia before the baby gets here. in only 10 more weeks...

more bits and pieces of life with mia

2006-11-30T08:36:00.000-08:00

per usual it we have not been good about updating on a regular basis so here is your dump of mia bits and pieces:

too much
any time you tell mia "i love you" now she will respond with "i love you TOO much". which? come on - that's the sweetest thing in the whole world and knowing that she came up with it on her own? makes me cry everytime.

***

pronouns
mia's been learning her pronouns lately (why?) and has to assign everything a him/her/he/she/it title. she gets a little hung up on the boy/girl thing but once she gets it she can't stop. charlie is now HIM and that bowl over there? that's HIS. crazy.

***

no....
she likes to run through a list of impossibles before giving a correct answer these days.

us: mia, where are your socks?
mia: i ate them? no.... charlie ate them? no.... in the car? no... in my room! silly mia.

***

not listening.
when mia's being "bad" she will come and ask you "i listening?" and then tell you that no, she is not listening. then she will giggle her evil giggle. so it's obvious that she knows what she's not supposed to be doing - she just gets a kick out of not being a good listener. little rebel.

the rules

2006-11-18T17:02:00.000-08:00

we've been working on "the rules" with mia as of late. i know that might sound kind of crazy since she's only 2 and whatever. but you know what? the kid needs some rules and i need a reason to tell her to get her damned finger out of her nose and stop screaming at people. and so i give you "the rules."

go kings

2006-11-16T16:21:00.000-08:00

"i wet." horrible words to hear at halftime when you've taken your daughter to a basketball game and left the diapers in the truck. we lucked out the rest of the evening. she went au naturel and just told me every time she had to go potty. she could have done without pulling her pants down to her ankles and exposing her naked booty to 17,315 adoring fans, but overall i prefer that over peeing her pants. so in the scheme of things, her first game as a walking, talking, potty using person was a huge success. mostly she just liked the chairs that folded up and down. i remember liking those too as a tot. she also enjoyed Slamson, the Kings lion mascot, and my buddy Paul's binoculars.

mostly though, she just enjoyed not watching the game and being in this giant loud place with a ton of people screaming and clapping. oh yeah, she liked the clapping too. clapping rocks.

but in the end, it all comes down to the poopoo with mia. sensing some drama developing with two minutes left in the game, she looked up at me with sad toddler eyes and said the word that daddy cannot respond "the game's almost over honey" to, she said, "poopoo daddy, poopoo." so we ran off to the nasty arena potty and she pooped and sang as i could hear the crowd cheering for God knows what reason. i would have to find out later on sportscenter.

but thank you mia for a lovely evening and at least now i have a good excuse to stay up and watch sportscenter.

"i talk a lot!"

2006-11-06T15:35:00.000-08:00

that's what josh and i heard when mia took a break from her constant chatter the other night. she was jabbering on and on and on and on (per usual) while josh and i were having our own conversation and then she paused (which shocked us both) and then told us "i talk a lot!" and immediately went back to the jabbering. i don't think josh and i have shared a laugh like that in a long long time.

***

"who broke it?" her latest question. if we come across something that she's done she'll ask us. if we come across something she doesn't think should be like it is she'll ask us. and sometimes? well sometimes she'll just ask us for no apparent reason. of course.

***

"where's (fill in the blank)?" where's daddy (she asks josh)? or mia (she asks anyone)? and on and on until we've all been accounted for.

***

"my uncle ben" mia found a photo of my youngest brother when he was in 1st grade (he's a senior in high school now, HI, BEN!) and has been carrying nit around with her insisting that it's her uncle ben and that she has to talk to him. all. the. time. unfortunately uncle ben is a teenager which means that he's either never home or sleeping. hee.

***

and just because we haven't talked about it for a while...POOP! mia's been pooping almost every day for over a week now. without crying! it's taken a year but i think she might finally be rounding the corner on her fear and trouble with the pooping. thank the lord! she's even just gone ahead and pooped without warning or mention 3 times while she was on the toilet peeing. i know that some of you might be thinking "so what? my kid poops all damned day without telling me." well ours doesn't. ours cries. goes 2-4 days between poops and hasn't pooped in her diaper (besides last month when she was sick) in a year. it's exciting times at our house. viva la poop!

happy halloween

2006-11-06T15:24:00.000-08:00

on her third halloween mia was a very scary lion. no really, she was really scary. ok, maybe not. she practiced her growling for days and when it finally came time to scare people all she managed to eek out was a put out "rowr." with her hands in front of her. completely embarassed at my asking her to do it. again.

but she put up with us since we promised to take her to the zoo with her friends and let her wear her costume to school and eat candy with more of her friends. i think it was worth the embarassment in the end.

we didn't end up trick or treating this year, though. between the zoo and the parade and trick or treating mia did at school she had, what we thought to be, enough fun. so we went shopping and to dinner instead and enjoyed what will be our last year ever that we can skip halloween without her knowing. jealous, aren't you?

of course, while we were at old navy we walked by the clearance rack and there was a chicken costume for $4. josh pleaded with me to buy and when i kept saying no he turned to mia and asked "honey, do you want a chicken costume?" and then it was all over.

"my chicken!!" she clutched the too big for her stuffed chicken costume to her chest and wouldn't let it go. telling everyone we passed that it was "my chicken." the next day when she woke up she cried and cried for the chicken costume (that was left in my car) and we had to put it on her first thing when we got home. i think she'll be wearing it a lot between now and next halloween (when it still won't fit her). hopefully i'll manage to get a photo of it soon...

the littlest octopus

2006-10-26T13:22:00.000-07:00

this baby is made entirely of elbows. at least 8 of them.

pregnancy update - doctor visit

2006-10-25T09:37:00.000-07:00

yesterday we had another check up. once again we were scheduled with dr. "i am only interested in your husband" - why are you an ob?! i have a 1 in 3 chance of this man delivering my baby and the thought horrifies me. will he even remeber i'm in the room as he's talking to josh about how HIS labor is going? grr.

anyway...the baby is doing fine. heart beating away (no idea how fast as the doctor doesn't talk to women and josh didn't ask) and moving around like a demon. baby, please don't be a demon, mama's too tired to deal with that. thanks.

i've gained another 4 lbs. which puts me at a total gain so far of 16. and as unhappy as i might be about that (because i know what it's going to look like when the baby's on the outside and i'm not all round anymore) i'm sitting here at work craving everything i don't have with me. because i was silly enough to bring fruits and vegetables to work today. thinking that would calm the beast. it does not. i need candy, chips and salsa, some bread would be nice. and maybe a soda. mmm...soda...

sing with me.

2006-10-24T14:53:00.000-07:00

on the days when mia likes to hear us sing (as opposed to the days when she stops us after 2-3 words and tells us "no singing, mama/dada") i love to watch her.

she won't sing with us, but she'll mouth the words along with us. just under her breath like she's talking to herself. trying to remember it all.

i'm trying to remember it all, too, baby.

back to basics

2006-10-24T06:41:00.000-07:00

mia's been having a rough time going to sleep these days. last night was particularly difficult. she had taken a late nap and was excited about a new hot wheel car she had gotten that day. she wouldn't put it down. nor would she take it out of her mouth (these damned molars - it's like she's an infant again with the putting of things in her mouth). 45 minutes past her bedtime i finally just took the car away and told her she could have it back in the morning. hoo boy did that not go well.

now, mia's not one for throwing temper tantrums (i totally jinxed us with that last post, didn't i?) and it's usually not a problem for her to let go of things. but man, with the combination of car love and overtiredness it was not a happy scene. there was screaming and crying and her throwing her body from one side of the bed to the other trying to get past me and get to her car. i finally had to just restrain her. rocking her back and forth, singing her lullabyes until she calmed down. i haven't had to do that for about a year. and honestly? i've missed it.

so we rocked and sang and she calmed down and asked me to snuggle her to sleep. which i did. just another refresher on having a baby in the house, i guess.

and speaking of babies...we have another checkup today and mia is really excited to go and listen to the baby go "BANG! BANG!" in my belly.

oh mia, you're so good at being 2.

2006-10-20T15:34:00.000-07:00

so mia's 2 now, did we mention that? and so far? so far it's not terrible at all. i mean sure, she's way more independent lately, but that's to be expected. she's still not having full blown tantrums, though. i imagine she's saving that for when the baby gets here. so let's enjoy her now :).

***

mia is finally tall enough to open the door to her room on her own and this only means that she has figured out how to stay out of bed as long as possible at night. once she's asleep she's golden, it's getting her there that's a challenge. she's learned that the following things will keep us in the room with her:

- snuggle me
- potty
- i peed (different from needing to go, and she knows it)
- i poop (liar!!)
- kisses, mama
- where charlie go?

***

the other day my belly was particularly stretched to the limit and i was really veiny. while mia and i were sitting on the couch watching elmo i pulled up my shirt so she could see #2 moving around. of course the baby stopped moving right away (it's first game of hide and seek!) but mia stared on anyway. then she poked me in the belly and asked me "who colored mama?" she wouldn't drop it, either. wanted me to wash up.

***

we played hookie as a family last week and went up to apple hill to pick pumpkins and what not. mia had her very first face professional face painting. i wasn't sure she would sit still once she realized that a stranger was going to be touching her but she was so enthralled by the paints that she sat stone still the whole time. of course, she didn't smile, either, but that's ok. didn't she look cool?

of course, as soon as we got in the car she upended her sippy cup of water on her arm (also painted) and rubbed it all off. we had left the pumpkin patch and there was no longer a need for the body paint, apparently. she's so my kid.

***

she's a talker, this one. she's been talking since she was about 11 months old so it's not really a surprise. what is a surprise is that she never shuts up. and that she speaks in complete sentences. all. the. time. no really. all the time. it's like having a voiceover for your whole life when you're with her. she comments on every little thing around her. and yes, i know at some point she is going to stop talking to me all together and i should appreciate it now. but dude. all. the. time.

she reminds me of her uncle ben when he was her age. the constant smiling and talking. never upset, always smiling. always talking. and her imagination is picking up, too. not quite like ben's did but still. it's pretty amazing to see her making things up and playing on her own with her toys and telling me all about something that she's imagined.

pregnancy - 24 weeks

2006-10-20T15:18:00.000-07:00

i'm a lot bigger this time around than i was with mia. and people can't seem to stop telling me as much. though they are kind enough to note that i don't have a fat face yet. isn't that sweet?

this baby seems to move around a lot more than mia did. josh tells me i'm imagining things because he remembers me telling him every single time mia moved. but she never moved at night and this one does. so i guess that's the difference. mia slept at night. still does. does that mean this one will be up all the time? god help us.

i'm starting to get really worried about having a baby in the house. i was never worried really worried with mia. i mean, it came and went but down deep i knew i would be ok. and as soon as she was born and in my arms i knew all i needed to know and would be able to take care of her completely. so far i'm not feeling that with this one. as a matter of fact i'm scared to have a tiny baby in the house. what do you do with babies again? i'm toddler conditioned now.

i've never been one to grab an infant out of someone's arms. never one that "had to hold the baby". but yesterday i fond myself reaching out for 3 month old baby - testing myself. it didn't last long. the baby, though cute and cuddly, was squirmy and bendy and couldn't hold itself up. then it started to whimper and then cry. "ok, here you go" and i handed him off to someone. anyone.

holy crap, i'm having a baby. just when i was getting comfortable with the toddler thing.

weights and measures.

2006-10-20T14:41:00.000-07:00

mia and i had dr. appts. say, oh, a month ago. let's talk about them now, shall we?

as mia turned 2 she weighed in at 21.5 lbs and is now 32 inches tall. so in the past 6 months she managed to take on a pound and maybe an inch. and josh was told that we were to feed her more and make sure that she ate because she's so tiny. for those of you paying attention you'll notice that josh took her to her appt. this time. the only appt. i have missed in 2 years as i had an ob appt. at roughly the same time - i'm already having scheduling conflicts with the kids!

mia and i had talked about her appt. for a couple days leading up to it and she was all prepared for them looking in her ears and seeing how big she'd gotten. there weren't going to be any shots and her daddy was going to go with her - woo hoo! yeah, no. she cried the whole time. poor thing. which made it traumatic for her to then meet me at my ob appt. only to find more doctors!

as for me and #2: i weighed in somewhere between 112 and 115 which means i gained somewhere between 5 and 8 lbs. last month. shut up, i don't want to hear it.

mia was very nervous with the doctor in the room with her mama and so she sat on my lap while we listened for the heartbeat. she showed the doctor exactly where the baby would be, too. she kept telling her the baby was high up in my belly (she's usually very specific about it being down low) but the doc wouldn't listen and so we waited and waited for her to find the little bugger. s/he was right where mia said s/he would be. kinda freaked the doc out. and then we heard the heartbeat. "loud!" said mia "bang! bang!"

so yeah, the baby's doing well. and is loud. and bangs on me a lot.

babies everywhere!

2006-09-26T10:20:00.000-07:00

because saturday was a holiday we resceduled our regular gymnastics class to monday morning. and you know what? it SUCKED. it was full of BABIES!! mia walked in ready to jump and play and run amok with the other toddlers and found herself the oldest in a large group of babies (the oldest other kid was only 15 months old and though it's a class for walkers-3yo there's usually a couple kids of each age group). her smile faded quickly. what was she supposed to do with all these babies?! where were her friends?!

at first she found she could play around the babies. sure, they couldn't really run or climb but they also weren't going to slow her down on the baby/toddler gauntlet! but the tumble track and trampoline were a different story. they kept falling down. they couldn't hop. they were in her way.

but at least she could count on the parachute, right? no. all those babies wanted to be held by their moms. which left no one to lift the parachute up and down. at one point mia just got up and walked away to play on her own.

it's funny, being the mom of an active toddler, how quickly i forgot about the younger toddler stage. suddenly mia was the "big kid" in the group - it was weird. she was patient with them - but there was a lot of sighing. i can only imagine that this is what it's going to be like at home for the next couple years.

happy new year!

2006-09-26T09:59:00.000-07:00

we had a busy weekend (again. aren't they all?) celebrating rosh hashana with josh's family on saturday and then working around the house on sunday. it was a great weekend, over all.

first we got all gussied up (well...mia did, anyway) and went to services and then out to lunch on saturday and then drove on down to visit family. good lord does mia love her cousins! big kids are the coolest, you know. especially when they're as big as sam and ze'ev. mia followed them around all day and tried to do whatever they were doing. and the boys were so patient with her - it was awesome to watch.

after stuffing our faces and visiting we headed home and mia slept the whole way (hooray!). when we got home mia went to sleep as peacefully as can be and josh and i stayed up chatting until midnight (2-3 hours past our regular bedtime!). and it's a good thing we did, too, because mia woke up covered in vomit around midnight. she puked in her sleep and was covered in it. poor thing - she was so confused. josh stripped the bedding while i gave her a bath and got her ready for bed. again. she was so sweet the whole time, too. she's such a trooper.

after brushing teeth and getting her some water to rehydrate we put her back to sleep and she was out right away. 15 minutes later she was covered in vomit again. ugh.

thank goodness the crib's set up and empty in the nursery because we were out of sheets and pillows at this point. in the crib she went. luckily she was done for the night.

and you'd think she'd sleep in the next morning, right? well you'd be wrong. up with the sun at 6:30. all smiles and giggles.

pregnancy - 20 weeks

2006-09-21T14:16:00.000-07:00

"half way" there now. i've been feeling pretty good. the pinched nerve happens less and less now and the headaches are all but gone (finally!). i've ballooned since last month and am not looking forward to seeing how much i've gained. i know i'm supposed to gain weight and it's not like i've been trying to watch it at all (mmm....chocolate) but still - i had just gotten back into most of my "skinny" clothes and it's a bit weird to have to pack them up again.

anyway - here's the belly:

i love this shot. and i love that mia is just out of the frame yelling at me to cover up my belly. she's so funny - it's ok if i'm topless but if i have a shirt on it has to be pulled down over the belly at all times.

we had our big ultrasound on monday and it went well. the baby is in there alive and punching me in the gut all day long. we explained to mia for 2 days that we would be looking at the baby with a special camera and we'd be seeing it on the tv. she seemed to understand and was even getting excited about it in the doctor's office. but when it was happening she was very suspicious of the whole thing.

1. i had to put on a robe in the middle of the day when not at home. why?
2. i had to lay on the table. why couldn't she lay on the table, too?
3. the lady pulled up the robe to expose the belly!! ahhh!!!
4. tons of goop was applied to the belly and mia was not allowed to touch it.
5. she was touching my belly!!!!

we told her that the tech (who was awesome and why couldn't i have gotten her with the first one i had with mia instead of some eastern block meanie?!) was taking pictures with her special camera and we could see them on the tv - just like when daddy takes pictures.

she wasn't buying it. her eyes, squinted and distrustful, went back and forth from the belly to the screen for minutes on end. and then she got bored and played in the room while we oohed and aahhed over the new little one (who, by the way, has a mean left jab and isn't afraid to use it. josh just might get himself a boxer after all).

and after the ultrasound i felt great. relieved, yes, but also physically great. with mia i left feeling beaten up and bruised for days. not this time. thank goodness.

and it's a good thing i liked the tech, too, because it looks like i'll get to see her again in 10 weeks. the ob's office just called to tell me that they'd like me to go back for a follow up at 30 weeks because it looks like i have a low-lying placenta (or placenta praevia). and after a couple minutes of me just staring into space and trying to to cry at work i hit up dr. google to find that it's not really a big deal.

everything will be fine. say it with me, now. everything will be just fine.

the people's chicken and other bits.

2006-09-19T12:12:00.000-07:00

mia has been learning the difference between what people do and what every thing else does. people, by the way, do quite a lot. every day she tells me something that people do, not charlie. and not the rocks, and not the plants, and so on and so forth. and then there are all the people out and about doing things! all the peolpes are eating! all the peoples are walking! the peoples are quite busy, it seems.

yesterday we were at ross returning some shoes and she passed by a basket of crap and a chicken caught her eye. i told her the chicken wasn't hers and we kept walking. as we walked she told me all about how it was "the people's chicken, mama. not mia's."

***

last night josh asked mia for a hug and kiss as she was on her way to bed and without so much as slowing down she told him "next time."

***

josh has taught mia that when we're stuck in traffic she should yell at all the other cars "get of the way, cars!" it's only funny for a minute.

***

she up and grew on us all of the sudden. mia has been stuck in roughly the same size clothes and shoes for about 6-8 months now. which is fine with me. she has the tiniest little feet - so narrow and dainty. we just picked her up a few pairs of size 5s to get her through the fall/winter (she's been wearing a 4.5 to 5 without complaint, mind you) and decided to size her feet while we waited at the store on sunday. turns out we've been binding her feet. she's a 6 and we were told to buy her a 6.5 since she's growing. i'm still a little freaked out that she up and grew a size like overnight.

my baby is no longer a baby.

the best party ever.

2006-09-19T11:30:00.000-07:00

saturday was more fun filled than we really expected. from the gymnastics with friends to the party (with even more friends) to the sleep over to the shopping the next day. it seemed like it would never end. and we're all still recovering, i think.

the bounce house was delievered friday night right before mia went to bed and she just had to get in. so we all bounced and squealed and had a good time. then she said goodnight to the bouncehouse and went to sleep. the first thing out of her mouth in the morning was "jump, mama? please?" so we put on jackets and headed outside to bounce at 7am.

then it was off to gymnastics with katia and special guest star, gemma! it was a strange class in that mia actually listened and particiapted the whole time. it was as if she was just waiting to turn 2 and then she would do the things that all the other 2 year olds do. and after an hour of jumping on the trampoline and running under the parachute we went home for lunch and naps.

and then the party started. i can't really even say what it was like to have all the toddlers running and bouncing and swimming and squealing. it was awesome. no meltdowns. no tantrums. no fights. and about 8 cameras to catch all the action. (if you want to see a big selection of the photos from the party go here or just check out our flickr photos on the right side of the screen)

and then there was the sushi. what 2 year old's party would be complete without a huge sushi spread? not ours, that's for sure. the kids all sat together in the living room and ate and ate and ate. as did their parents. it was one of josh's finer ideas.

josie and her moms spent the night and we escaped mia's attacks the next morning when she realized that they were all in the living room. sleeping. she immediately pounced on the bed. and then off of the bed. and then on the bed. and then off of the bed. and...well you get the idea. thanks for staying the night, guys!

after a mean breakfast (thanks, josh!) we went shoe shopping with gemma and her folks. here's the thing about mia - she loves to shop. i blame this on the klapow genes bacause she certainly doesn't get it from me. she tried on all the shoes in the store exclaiming "i like these!" with each pair. gemma, on the other hand, was not having it and kept insisting that her zoe and elmo light up shoes were fine, thank you very much. and she would just wear them to the wedding if that was alright. it wasn't :)

and so the party officially ended. she was asleep before we hit the freeway and slept for 4 straight hours. as did her mama.

i know this is a quick and lame recount of the party with no funny stories but people? i am tired. and the pictures tell the story better than i ever could.

happy birthday, mia. i hope you had as much fun as your parents did.

mia's birthday elephant

2006-09-15T08:10:00.000-07:00

so there was a man dressed in a green elephant suit outside the chevron today. he was not outwardly promoting anything, no sign waving or message on his t-shirt, so the purpose of the elephant was not entirely clear. so it must have been mia's birthday elephant because today is mia's birthday and why else would that man be in an elephant costume.

on our way to school i told mia about her birthday river as we crossed the river and also her birthday rapid transit bus. before we got to her school mia pointed out to me that i had failed to mention her birthday train so as we passed the train mia screamed excitedly about mia's birthday choo choo.

let the festivities begin!

2006-09-13T15:05:00.000-07:00

this past weekend we had the first of 2 birthday parties for mia. she's turning 2 this week, you know!

this party was for close family and friends in our area. and it was so much fun! the kids were well behaved and entertaining themselves. the grandparents got to soak up all kinds of mia love and i got to eat lots of cupcakes. a perfect day all around.

and mia got to practice blowing out candles and singing happy birthday to herself. we'd been practicing the song all week leading up to the party and when it came time for the big event she helped people when they sang "happy birthday to..." by inserting an excited "ME!"

she even helped make the cupcakes (not that she ate any. weirdo.)

and this coming weekend we get to have another party - this time with all our flickr friends! can you say baby cage fight? oh yeah.

oh yeah, i'm pregnant!

2006-09-07T11:53:00.000-07:00

i'm not quite sure how i suddenly got to be 18 weeks along and haven't written anything about it yet - but that's exactly what has happened. i think about it every day (obviously) and what i would write down if i were going to - and then i don't. so now i'm going to try and make up for the last few months. please bear with me - i really want to have a record of this for later. You can check out all the photos from the pregnancy here. if you would like to relive my pregnancy with mia (and who wouldn't!) you can check here (there is also a link to the right).

***

5/29/06
memorial day 2006 - another holiday start (we found out about mia on christmas day 2004). the test came out really dark. no doubt about it dark. i was so scared and excited all at the same time. after 3 miscarriages between september 2005 and january 2006 i was not prepared for another one. but there was no doubt about this test - there was something going on. holy crap.

we sat on the information for a couple days and then told family and close friends. i'm sure people were weary of me telling them i was pregnant at that point - just knowing they'd have to console me later. bah.

***

7/3/06
at nine weeks i wrote this down elsewhere:

i'm pregnant. 9 weeks along now - or so the calendar tells me. i really can't get a grasp on it, though. and because it's my 5th pregnancy and i've lost 3 in a row i don't really want to talk about it. well...i do...but it's hard. i want to be all screaming to the world "i'm tired and bitchy becuase i'm having a baby!!!" but i might not have a baby and then i will have screamed for nothing. again. so i'm not telling anyone. just immediate family and 1 or 2 close friends and the invisible friends on the internet.

so here's the breakdown:

i'm pregnant
but i might not really be pregnant. again.
if i am i could still lose it. again. (everytime i go to the bathroom i obsessively check for blood. every stomach ache i have i'm sure i'm having a miscarriage. )
i could totally stay pregnant this time!
holy shit - how are we going to pay for daycare?!
i need a drink!!! - oh yeah, i'm pregnant.

i can't even tell the people who know how scared i am. how sure i am that when i go in to have my ultrasound on wed. that i'll end up having to schedule a d&c. again. i'm trying so hard to stay positive and at the same time brace myself for the possibility that it's not going to work out. and so it goes.

and so here i sit, crying my eyes out over something i can't do anything about. again. i haven't cried like this in a long time and you know what? i feel a bit better now. 9:30am is not too early for ice cream, i have decided.

***

7/5/06
and then there was this:

pretty cool, right? here's what i wrote down that day:

i'm stunned. apparently there is a small person living in my stomach. swimming around, heart beating, newly formed hands waving. living.

we (josh is awesome about coming to appts with me) went in for our first check up and ultrasound yesterday. he was calm and collected, not a care in the world. i was anxious. sweaty. near tears.

as i laid down for the ultrasound i closed my eyes and waited for those words "doesn't seem to be a heartbeat". but instead i heard "there's the little one..." my eyes flipped open and tears streamed down my face. no joke - it was right there on the screen. my little one. and just one. "alive and single - just how we like 'em!", said josh.

so we stared for a while and had pictures printed up for us so we could stare some more. and that's what i've been doing since yesterday.

i'm in all sorts of shock and disbelief. i really didn't expect good news. i mean, i really hoped for good news, shit - even twins! but did i expect it? no. part of my defense mechanism is to set myself up for the worst. that way i can only be pleasantly surprised because i "knew it wouldn't work out". this might sound silly, and it might not really help, but it's what i do.

basic dr. visit stats - i'm starting this pregnancy at 103 lbs. 8 lbs. less than i was when i started with mia but a whole lot flabbier.

***

8/1/06
2 week check-in with the doctor. ganied 1 lb - putting me a 104. the heartbeat is there and strong, whew!

i was really bugged by the doc that checked me out this time (we rotate through the docs in the practice until the last couple months). he was nice and all but he was way more interested in how josh was handling the pregnancy than me. must have asked him 4 times if he had any questions. and he only let us listen to the heartbeat for a couple seconds.

but still! it was there!

***

mia told the daycare instructors that i was pregnant.

she was sitting with a pregnant teacher and they were asking mia about the baby in the teachers fat belly and she told them matter-of-factly "mama baby belly".

they thought it was pretty cute and told me about it when i picked her up that night. they were shocked to find out that i was actually pregnant. she's smart, i'm telling you.

she's been so sweet about the baby. i really think she might know what's going on (sort of). she pets my belly and gives it hugs and kisses. if you ask her where the baby is she's very clear that's it's down low in my belly (not sure where she picked that up - but she's right). she's gonna be an awesome big sister.

***

the first few months i felt nothing but headaches. i kept hoping they would pass...but no. i never did get "sick" though. but the headaches, ugh! like the worst hangover ever and i couldn't even take anything to make it better.

i didn't want to eat and when i did it was crap (just like a hangover!). the worse i felt the less water i wanted to drink and then the headache got worse....and around and around we go.

i've also got a mean pinched nerve in my left leg. if it keeps up like this i might just chop it.

***

8/29/06
16 week check-in with the doctor. gained 3 lbs. - putting me at 107. good lord...3 lbs?! all those burgers are catching up to me, damn it.

i was starting to get worried about the baby again. 4 weeks is really too long to go between visits, i think. and then, just a couple days before my appt. i felt the first little kicks. a whole month earlier than i felt mia and it was such a relief. i will gladly have my guts kicked for an extra month if it lets me know the baby is alive and well.

and apparently it is.

***

9/7/06
and that brings us to today.

the headaches are finally subsiding which is wonderful. i finally feel like a normal person again (relatively speaking, of course).

i have moved into maternity clothes full time as of 2 weeks ago. my body remembers pregnancy well and wants to jump to the end, i guess. a full month earlier into the fat pants with this one than i was with mia. at least it's still hot here so i can wear my clothes from my first pregnancy (all summer clothes). and by the time winter rolls around i'm guessing i'll be pretty hot anyway.

i've done pretty well with avoiding the negative thoughts about the pregnancy. i have all but stopped having vivid, out of nowhere thoguhts of miscarrying. of planning how we would handle things, how long it would tak me to "recover" from this one. if i would ever want to try again.

yesterday was rough, though. yesterday i realized that there is always the chance that something could go wrong. that the baby could be unhealthy. or deliver early. or not at all. it was a rough night. and just as i was beginning to slip into a depression about it? the bugger kicked me as if to say "get over yourself. there's nothing you can do so just chill out and enjoy it." kick kick. good advice, little one. thank you.

***

so there you go - 4.5 months all rolled into one not-so-short entry. and yes, i added the cliche pregnancy ticker - it'll be gone in a few months :)

not mama's. (also, she's hiding things.)

2006-09-07T11:26:00.000-07:00

or daddy's, or charlie's, or yours for that matter!

mia is very clear on what belongs to who in the world as of late. she will point to things and tell me who owns them and i have to agree with her. she's already good at arguing her points.

lat night at dinner (without josh) she ebgan doling out the food: mia's chip, mama's chip and daddy's chip - which she placed at the empty space where daddy should have been. it sat there all throughout dinner just in case he showed up. she's a sweet one.

***

mia doesn't like to count. or so we thought. i think it's just that we're always suggesting that she count. and asking her how many things there are around us. so she counts to 2 and there area always 2 things.

but the other day i was folding laundry and she was typing on the keyboard and singing otuloud when i noticed that she was hitting all the numbers and the little shit counted to 12. 12! of course when i asked her to do it again she got a sly little grin on her face and stopped at 2. little bugger.

what else is she keeping from us?!

pretty boobies

2006-09-07T11:16:00.000-07:00

yesterday mia woke up earlier than normal and i was home to greet her all bleary eyed and bed headed in the hall. i picked her up and she chirped a happy "good morning" to me. then she looked down at my chest and told me in the sweetest voice i've ever heard "pretty boobies, mama." and then she pet them for a long time. she really meant it and it made my day.

ok, she probably meant my shirt was pretty but i takes what i can get, people!

look! an update!

2006-08-30T13:51:00.000-07:00

enough is enough already - i'm here to catch you all up on the last month. every day there is something that i make a mental note of so that i can tell you all how funny/ridiculous/weird/sweet mia is being. and then i forget to tell you. sorry. i've been busy. and tired.

ok! moving on!

the following is a list of things that i can remember from the last month:

when you tell mia "guess what?" she will respond with "i love you". it's awesome. except when she's bored with me asking her guess what and she responds like a bored teenager.

***

she will finally smile for the camera if you promise to let her take some photos, too. it usually comes out looking like this:

***

daycare suggested that mia might be ready for potty training as she was having dry diapers for most every day. and going on the potty everytime the offered it to her. hooray! so we got her some cloth training pants:

after 3 washings they didn't work. she hated them. we switched to pull ups and now she's about 60/40 with the potty. she's lazy about it but i don't really care because i'm lazy, too. diapers, they are so convenient!

***

mia's in a big kid bed now. she made the transition smoother than we could have imagined and hasn't looked back. this is a photo of her mat on the ground (total squatter style room that i except to see again once she hits 16) - she's in a twin bed now and after 1 night hasn't fallen to the ground. we're hoping she'll skip the falling out of bed thing.

***

she sings all the time and wants us to sing with her. but if josh gets too carried away and starts dancing and really getting into things she gets disgusted and tells him "nooo, daddy!" already embarassed by the old man.

***

cats are scary. she has been traumatized by a neighborhood cat who jumped up to her a little too quickly. she got scared and screamed. the cat got scared and hissed. nightmares followed for DAYS. and now she won't go near a cat. so don't ask her to. our friend conchita tried to give her an animal puppet to play with and mia freaked out because it was a cat. stupid cats.

and yet she loved BEING a cat:

***

as soon as we get in the car after daycare we are "almost home" "almost at the river" and "not home yet" all at the same time. she loves driving over the "pretty river with fishies" (and sometimes a boat!) and says goodbye to it as we pass. she's a sweetie, this one.

***

she's not always sweet, though. when we're boring her she begins to act out, not listen, etc. you know, the typical toddler stuff. but she does it all with such a smile on her face it's hard to be mad for long. even when she's in timeout she's a happy camper. she sits in the tiny dark hallway and giggles. stands on her head. talks to her toes. just waiting for the beep of the microwave to tell her that her 2 minutes are up. and then she's back to normal again.

next we'll move on to the not so new news and tell you all about mia's new room.

she's a weirdo but she's ours.

2006-07-27T10:34:00.000-07:00

it's funny the things mia will suddenly notice. things you thought she knew about before but apparently? not so much. this week mia noticed that josh is hairy. "hairy legs? hairy arms? hairy face? hairy neck? hairy head?" yes, josh is hairy. i compared him to the dog (who is also quite hairy) and she thought that was pretty cool. josh did not.

***

mia does not like josh being in the bathroom with her anymore. he has to wait at the door for her to finish. he is also not allowed to push the cart at the grocery store if i am around. she would rather sit still and try to make the cart move by swinging her legs back and forth than let daddy push the cart. it's mama's job.

***

mia's cousins came from texas to meet her and play 'til they dropped. ian is almost 4 and aidan is almost 2.5 and they are BOYS. they fit that "all boy" stereotype pretty well. sweet boys, yes. but boys that wrestle and fight and run and jump and get time out. mia was havnig a great time watching them play but was content to sit on the sidelines and not get hurt. silly boys.

the thing about older boys is that they go to time out. a lot. mia doesn't go to time out. (there was a time when we did the "think time" routine that her daycare was doing but her new daycare doesn't do that and she has since forgotten it. anyway...) after a day and a half of visiting mia came home, walked up and slapped me (not hard) right in the face and screamed out "TIME OUT!" i was shocked. i asked her if she wanted time out and she got very excited and squealed "YES!" thanks jen.

the lies we tell.

2006-07-17T12:37:00.000-07:00

i just had to promise mia that i would take her on an airplane after her nap. you know, instead of going to the vet. she's going to be so disappointed.

daddy's girl weekend

2006-07-03T09:30:00.000-07:00

i asked mia if she had fun this weekend and she said "yes, daddy." and my heart melted and slipped into my belly.

saturday morning josh got up with mia and let me sleep in. until 9. 9!! they played and giggled and watched sesame street. i lay in bed listening to them play airplane while chasing the dog around the house, read book after book and make breakfast together. it was like a random mother's day.

after i took her to gymnastics and she had a nap josh took her to the park (while i napped!) for at least an hour. and they were together all night.

sunday night we went to a rivercats game. mia sat on her daddy's lap and ate chili cheese fries and drank lemonade. sadly, she didn't enjoy baseball the same way she enjoys basketball (and how could you). she kept saying "no ball?" no worries, we were all bored, mia.

these two were made for each other, i tell ya.

we're alive!

2006-06-29T13:47:00.000-07:00

we're just getting back to our normal routine after a short vacation with friends and a visit from mia's aunt jessica. boy are we ever tired. tired, i tell you!

aunt jess is the coolest!

jessica came to visit for 10 days and mia now has a new idol. within the first day i had been pushed aside in favor of "an jayca". it's amazing how similar teenagers and toddlers can be: they both giggle non stop, need naps in the middle of the day, eat like horses or not at all - but you never know which one it's gonna be, and completely wear you out.

aunt jessica is queen of the night-night game and i love her for it. it started back in december when we went home for christmas and has since evolved to a more complex game that includes "hiding". everyday since jess left mia runs into the living room as soon as we get home, lays her dog shaped pillow on the ground and throws a beanbag chair over her head. "nigh nigh. my hiding." followed by giggles and demands that you get under the beanbag chair with her. such a nerd.

jessica left on monday and we've been sad and lonely without her. mia is bored and i'm tired of crawling under the vinyl beanbag with her. please send her back, mom and dad.

to the beach!

we have been dying to get to the beach since we were invited months ago and the day finally arrived. we all piled in the car and drove the 5 hours straight to aptos, ca.

mia's a HUGE fan of the sandbox at school, loves the water and loves her friend, josie. sounds perfect, doesn't it?! umm...no. turns out our kid hates the beach. the water's too cold and the beach sand sticks to your body OH MY GOD GET IT OFF!!!!! sigh...maybe next year.

we spent one perfect and exhausting day with the kids at the monterey bay aquarium - i couldn't believe how much they loved it. we thought that they would acknowledge the fish but not be too overly excited by them and proably fall asleep in the stroller. man were we wrong.
there was running and screaming for "more fish! more penguins! shark!!" they even got to hang out in a giant penguin egg - how many of you can say you've done that?!

if i could take mia there everyday i would. it was that good.

ah but we had to go home. :( we spent our last day on the coast between santa cruz and san francisco. there was a lot of time spent in the car and mia didn't nap. she was cranky and whiny (which is odd for her, really). by the time we got home that night she was done with us all and ready for bed. as i was changing her into her pj's i thought she was a bit hot and dusted off the thermometer (she's never sick, you know).

103.7

holy. crap. so we loaded her up on tylenol and she sweat out whatever little bug she'd managed to pick up. thank goodness.

other things

barnacle - i think a week out of daycare really threw her for a loop and she ended up attached to me for nearly a week. and the whining, oh my god, make it stop! i even had to send her to her room the other day:

mia: waaa...
mom: stop whining or you can go to your room. do you want to go to your room?
mia: yes.
mom: ok, go to your room, see you later.

at which point mia went to her room, played for 5 minutes and came back a happier baby. hasn't happened since.

"i want it" - not quite as sweet and cute as her "thank you" but still pretty cute. except when it's combined with theh whining. then it sucks.

playdoh - mia's discovered playdoh. but playdoh isn't for making things. oh no. playdoh is for taking out of the container and putting back in the container. over and over again.

"red!" - everything is red. if you ask mia what color something is? red! what shape it is? red! what it IS? red!

***

i will leave you with a photo of mia and her friend, owen. the cutest kids in town.

mia did it!

2006-06-02T06:50:00.000-07:00

this morning mia woke up a bit earlier than ususal so i didn't rush in to get her. after some initial grumblings she was quiet and i thought maybe she had gone back to sleep. and then i heard the giggling.

as i stood at her door i heard her exclaim "mia did it!" she sounded so pleased with herself and i couldn't think what she could have done form her crib. it took me a minute to realize what she had done - what had caused that huge smile on her face.

she had taken off her pajamas, removed her wet diaper and put her pajamas back on again. they were inside out, the pants were on backwards and she had shoved both her legs into one pant leg. the shirt wasn't completely on but she didn't seem to mind.

"mia did it!"

these are the mornings when i am reminded how lucky i am to be her mom.

a new friend.

2006-05-31T08:00:00.000-07:00

this morning i asked mia who her friends would be today and her response was an emphatic "dirt!". and then she declared "mia happy." which made my day. mia is happy.

***

there's no more chacha and it's kinda sad. mia says charlie's name loud and clear. yesterday i asked her if she wanted to go home and see charlie or go and visit her daddy at work..."charlie!!"

we went to visit josh anyway.

what's new.

2006-05-30T07:52:00.000-07:00

mia's done with her first week at her new school, she got her first haircut and memorial weekend came and went. we've been busy with a bunch of nothing.

one week later.

mia's in love with her new school. by day 3 she was no longer crying when josh dropped her off in the morning and is so worn out at the end of the day she just wants to go "hooooommmme" when she sees me.

she has now pooped 3 times without screaming or blood. she still has the initial fear of going but that's it. once she gets going it's not a problem. you can't imagine the kind of stress this is taking off of all of us - it's wonderful. yesterday she was in the bathroom with me while i was taking a shower and needed to go poop, i would open the shower door to check on her every now and again and she yelled at me to close the door. she needed her privacy to make her "wow! stinky poopoo!" hee hee - she's growing up.
her vocabulary is growing more and more. she says "potty" now instead of the weird "fafa" thing she had going on. i give complete credit to the daycare as they actually take her all day long.
she has discovered the joy that is the sandbox. my house is compeltely covered in sand. the other day i went to pick her up and she was playing in the dirt and when she saw me she splayed out and pretended to be swimming. in the dirt. that's my girl.
she drinks from a cup instead of a sippy every chance she gets. just a week ago she was all choking and covered in water. ah, but now she's a big kid.
no more sippy cup at nap time!!

the haircut.

she loves it. some of you out there are all "it's crooked. it's too short. it looks weird." and to you i say - BAH! mia loves it. it has to be this short to keep the hair out of her eyes when she's in the water. and it's not crooked - it's curly. so there. last night mia spent her entire bathtime pouring water over her head. she is a different kid with the bangs. but holy moly she's not a baby anymore.

memorial weekend.

yardwork, gymnastics, swimming and the zoo. that pretty much sums it up. we slept in as much as mia would let us (we're teaching her to snuggle and relax in the bed instead of jumping on our heads - it's a long process) and just lounged around all weekend, really. a pretty perfect weekend, all in all.

my aunt nancy invited su over for a bbq and a swim - so much fun! lat year mia was a little lump in the pool. she enjoyed it but wasn't overly impressed. this year she turned into one of those kids that insists they're not cold as they're shaking and turning blue.

mamma jamma. damnit.

2006-05-25T07:28:00.000-07:00

for the past 2 weeks mia has been saying "damnit". at first we thought it was just something that sounded like damnit. surely our little angel hadn't picked up a curse word from her parents. no, that wasn't it at all. but then the pronunciation and context couldn't be ignored.

she would be playing with her something and when she couldn't get it to do what she wanted she would scowl and say "damnit". "uh-oh" has been replaced by "damnit" whenshe drops things. she tells the dog "damnit". sigh...it's all my fault.

but during the past 4 days there has been another development. now she says something like "damma" at random things. it's not damnit but it also has no meaning. it is the first word she's used that we can't put a meaning to. she screams it while she points at the counter, looks otu the window, eats her food, runs in circles....there's no pattern.

mia: damma!!
me: pajamas?
mia: yeah. damma!!
me: frogs?
mia: yeah. damma!!
me: mamma jamma?
mia: yeah!!!

my only guess is that josie has taught her a bit of her crazy language.

damnit.

starting over.

2006-05-24T14:51:00.000-07:00

yesterday was mia's first day at her new daycare and it went GREAT! she cried for all of 10 seconds when josh dropped her off and then quickly forgot that she had parents at all.

when i picked her up that afternoon she merely glanced my way as i walked in the door. per usual. when i asked her if she had a good day she exclaimed "YEAH!" and showed me all around, telling me how they danced and played and went potty.

she took her first nap ever without her sippy cup and...get this...she even pooped. i almost fell down dead when they told me. they must think i'm a big liar. mia played "independently" and was a happy kid all day long, they said. no problems at all.

and when it was time to say goodbye? she cried. wasn't ready to leave all the fun behind and go home with boring old mama. and then she sang "E I E I O" all the way home. my kid sings now (of course this probably has a lot to do with josie singing the same song for 2 days, but whatever).

and then this morning she slept in. josh had to wake her up so they could leave. i'm in love already. who knew i would fall so fast?

***

in other news, we had a fun filled weekend with josie and her moms and new friends from inside the computer!

we started out by going to a baby gymnastics class with mia's friend, katia. holy moly was that ever fun! mia ran and jumped and played and watched all the big kids on the balance beam in complete awe. we're totally signing up for this class!

then there was naked baby swimming - and hoo boy those girls had fun! i certainly didn't think that they'd have enough energy to go to the park and then out for dinner. but they did. and how.

low attention span.

2006-05-19T13:41:00.000-07:00

mia loves for us to sing to her. she's particularly fond of "wheels on the bus" and will spin her hands around each other and insist "mama. bus." and so we sing:

us: the wheels on the bus go round and round..round and...
mia: shh. shh. (finger touching nose)
us: the mommies on the bus say...
mia: daddy. shh. daddy.
us: the daddies on the bus say shh...
mia: woof.
us: the doggies on the bus say woof...
mia: mama! la la la (the cue to sing the elmo song)

and so on and so forth. she can't be bothered to hear the whole verse. i suppose i should be grateful that i don't have to sing the whole song but geez, she's so rude sometimes. :)

mia did it!

2006-05-19T09:50:00.000-07:00

no, she didn't poop...

she's growing more and more independent these days. every day when we get in the car she has to clip the carseat buckle herself. same with her booster seat. "mia do it" followed by "i did it!"

of course last night i couldn't tell if she was wandering around the house saying "do it" as she tried to shove a vhs tape back in it's case or "damn it" because it wouldn't go in. hee hee.

***

today is mia's last day at her daycare center. she's been loved and spoiled there since she was 3.5 months old and it's a sad day. she's completely in love with her teacher, ms. bonnie, and ms. kimberlee does her hair for her everyday (since josh can't figure out the rubberbands yet). she has friends that she hugs and kisses and plays with and fights with everyday.

but it's also a really exciting day. it's time to make a change. we're moving to a much nicer facility and into a class where she already knows some of the kids. so it'll be fine. right?

wish us luck.

chatty cathy

2006-05-17T14:55:00.000-07:00

mia's been talking up a storm lately. more than just her usual chit chat - new words are flowing out all the time and it's hard to keep up with how much she's learning. she knows some of her shapes and colors, she can remember things from days ago, she can is learning to recognize emotions and can put on a happy/sad/angry face if you ask her to. and really? it's all freaking me out.

mother's day 2006

2006-05-17T14:45:00.000-07:00

we had such a nice weekend. josh's parents came down friday night and woke up with mia, letting us sleep in until the unthinkable 8am. it was wonderful! later in the day josh's brother and family came by for a bbq. mia was so excited to see her cousins. the first thing she asked me for on sunday was to go outside with the big kids and splash. she cried and cried when i told her that they were gone.

sunday we cuddled in bed until mia got too bored. and then we just sat around and enjoyed the day. it was perfect.

what i can't get over is how much more of a KID she is these days. and an awesome one, at that.

2006-05-09T15:13:00.000-07:00

daddy's girl.

suddenly mama isn't good enough anymore. mia has figured out that her dad is pretty darn fun and that he doesn't always know that mama has said no already. twice she has not wanted me to take her to read her final book of the day "no mama. dada." and if she needs the bathroom in the middle of the night she cries for him to join us in the bathroom. maybe i should be sad that i'm not always her parent of choice anymore but honestly? i have been waiting for this - mama needs a nap :)

she’s a good mama, that baby.

mia has taken to wrapping everything she can in a “baby blanket” ... when she’s done with her dinner she wraps it up in her napkin, rocks it on her shoulder. then throws it on the table and yells “all done, mama."

she's finally fallen for a stuffed animal. two actually (because everything is TWO! these days). first there was yoyah (grover). i have been wanting to get her a grover doll like the one we sent her cousin and internet friend for a long time, but i knew that she would just toss him aside. well i finally did it - and she's in love. she force feeds him dinner (which she then yanks out of his mouth and gobbles up noisily), makes him drink out of her sippy cup and even sleeps with him.

a week or so ago she noticed a teddy bear that has been sitting on a shelf in her room since before she was born and insisted that i bring it down for her. she hugged it like it was a long lost friend and it hasn't left her bed since. every night she places grover on one side of her pillow and te-ey baur (teddy bear) on the other, puts them both in the strangle hold and says "two."

outside!!!

it's all we hear these days. she has to be outside or life is simply not worth living. we were doing yard work this weekend and she was a great help - even offered to fix the drip system for josh.

towards the end of the day she screamed bloody murder until we put her in the truck. and so we did. we rolled down the windows and closed all the doors and left her in the truck while we finished up the yard work. weird baby.

allergies.

mia's got her mama's allergies, it seems. they knocked her out for a day with the puffy and goopy but for the most part she seems to be ok. she's like a little mutant baby evolving past things one at a time. good thing, she looked pretty pathetic.

poop. and.

2006-05-05T23:52:00.000-07:00

tonight mia pooped a big poop. a poop that made her angle herself in strange ways on the potty and strain and cry. but when it was all over she stood over the toilet and exclaimed...

WOW! POOP!

it's progress, the more proud and the less afraid she is of pooping the better it is for all of us. so...all together now...WOW! POOP!

***

i forget exactly how it went but i'm quite sure that mia used the word "and" while talking to me today. she's amazing.

first day of summer.

2006-04-27T14:57:00.002-07:00

yesterday marked the first day of summer here (as far as i'm concerned, anyway). it was 80 degrees, mia slept in something other than full body footie pajamas for the first time in god knows how long, we kept her ceiling fan on all night and this morning there was no need for a jacket.

it's summer. and it's only going to get hotter. ugh.

we decided last minute to go out to dinner and had already taken out mia's pigtails - we took her out in public like this:

one day she will pay us back by wearing her hair like this on her own.

after dinner we walked past a hair salon and mia stopped dead in her tracks. she stared inside for a bit then looked at us and pointed inside - grunting to be taken in. i asked her "do you want a haircut?" (like i have done a handful of times before when i have attempted to trim her bangs - to which she has always screamed no and run away) she grabbed the nest on top of her head, nodded and said "haircut." and cried all the way home when i wouldn't take her into the salon to have her hair did. for the next hour all i heard was a very pathetic cry for a haircut.

***

mia's latest and greatest saying:

(as she's running away) "ninny! ninny!"

bossy miss

2006-04-25T15:39:00.000-07:00

mia woke up from her nap yesterday screaching. which meant that she woke me up from my nap (which was quite rude but i will forgive her because she's so cute). i brought her back into my bed to grab a few more minutes of sleep and after gifting me an additional 15 minutes in bed (not sleeping, mind you - there is much to much poking me in the eye and giggling to be done) she'd had enough.

"up, mama!" (poke poke)

"a GO!"

"no blanket! NONONO!!" (yanking blanket off of me)

"UP!"

yes, mia. of course, mia.

my heart, it swells.

2006-04-25T07:23:00.000-07:00

i've been singing mia her own little song for months and months now, it goes a little something like this (feel free to sing along):

mia rose! with a booger in her nose!
mia rose! with a finger in her nose!

over the weekend the light finally came on and she jammed her finger in her nose. i couldn't be more proud.

two weeks later...

2006-04-20T14:37:00.000-07:00

passover
josh's parents came over for passover and we had a very relaxing dinner and visit. josh and i cooked and recovered from another night of screaming from mia while babi and zadi were trapped in the playroom with mia and her blocks. everyone got to visit and josh and i got some peace and quiet. until around midnight...

mia is now 19 months old
in only 4 more months she will be 2. that can't be right...

easter
after another night of screaming (this one a good 3 hour block) we had my aunt nancy and uncle bill over for brunch. yet another relaxing holiday! mia's too little and doesn't have any cousins around to teach her the goodness of the easter basket so we have been handing out the candy sparingly. she loses her mind when she sees the basket "BITE! BITE! BITE!" so we keep it hidden. yes, we're bad parents.

baby ballet
what? i didn't mention that we're taking a mama and baby ballet class? well we are. stop laughing.

it's 3 saturdays of mia and a handful of other girls in a gym. they dance and since and run in a circle. not really ballet. except for the outfits. oh the outfits! tulle and sequins and tights oh my! but not mia. mia is in sweat pants (what? they're pink!) and a tee shirt. again, bad parents.

so far the two times she's walked into the class she's had this look on her face like we're playing a joke on her. "no really, where are we going? and why are these girls dressed so silly? can we go outside now?" but then 20 minutes in she starts playing along and has a good time.

maybe tumbling instead?

and last night...
it's been so nice the past couple days that we can go outside and play in the yard when we get home. last night mia spent an hour running around the yard with various sticks, rotting oranges, leaves, etc. singing her name over and over. "mia mia...mia mia...mia mia..." for an hour. too funny.

and she slept!!!! all the way through the night like normal. whew. so now i plan on wearing her out but good before bedtime.

run run run!

very funny - now go to sleep.

2006-04-05T11:13:00.000-07:00

daylight savings time and west facing windows suck.

mia's not tired. ever. she's been on a steady 6:45 bedtime with 12 hours of uninterrupted sleep for a long time now. and all of the sudden she's not tired. not at all. and has no intention of laying in her bed until her body relents and she falls asleep. none at all.

last night she was up until just after 8 with the screaming and the giggling and the lying about needing to go potty. i guess it's time to up the bedtime. that's really going to cut into our tivo time... ;)

the best part of last nights shananigans is that mia has taken to tickling us. so as we're rocking quietly in her room a tiny hand comes creeping up to my neck followed by a sweet little "tickle tickle, mama" followed, of course, by the giggles.

busy busy

2006-04-04T13:17:00.000-07:00

despite all the rain that's been dumping on us we've managed to get out and do some fun things. we went to fairytale town and the zoo a couple weeks ago and this last weekend we went to a friend's birthday party at the bowling alley. mia's an awesome little bowler!

she's growing up so fast and furious these days. her vocabulary is getting too much to keep up with - we're surprised every time a new word pops out of her mouth (and that none of them are curse words!).

lately she tells us "shhh...babies..." - the infant room is right next door to her room at school and they must shush them when the babies are napping. and now we're getting shushed.

she's also started hitting us. not out of anger (yet) but when she's tired or over excited she'll give us a good smack. sigh...

and she's a big fat liar, too. when she doesn't want to go to sleep (thanks, daylight savings time!) she'll cry and carry on about how she has to go potty. and when we take her to the bathroom (we can't say no - don't want to discourage using the potty) she giggles and giggles and doesn't pee. LIAR!

look, no talk of poop!

2006-03-29T14:34:00.000-08:00

the kid needs a sibling.

we picked up a table and 2 chairs for the little one and oh how she loved them! the only problem is that she can't sit in 2 chairs at once.

the first time she sat down at her "big kid" table with her snack and juice she ate a couple bites, got up, pushed in her chair, moved her food and drink to the other side of the table, pulled out the other chair, sat down and had a couple bites, got up, pushed in her chair...you get the idea...she did this for a LONG TIME before i finally had to go and sit down in one of the chairs. she just couldn't sit in one chair more than the other - she loved them both so much!

weirdo.

***
mia is now the proud owner of 5 lovely fishies. when we first got them 2 weeks ago she just stood there making fish faces at her new friends. as though they were having a conversation only they could hear.

"EEEAT! FISHHH EAT!!" and there is much shaking of the fish food and screaming. and so we feed them.

every night she kisses them goodnight (scaring the bejeezus out of them when she bangs her noggin on the glass) and every morning the first words out of her mouth are "goo moanin', fishhhh"

***

latest greatest phrase: oh, dada... (very exasperated like)

you really have to hear this to appreciate it (note to self to get it on video before it's no longer cute but just snotty). she's obviously aware of what complete idiots we are.

***

mia's understanding possession now. everything has an owner.

chair? mama's chair!
sock? dada's sock!
pants? mama's pants!

all. day. long. what's funny is that nothing is "mia's", which is nice for now because soon i know that all we'll hear is "MINE!"

18 months old. and more talk of poop.

2006-03-17T11:20:00.000-08:00

mia turned 18 months old on wednesday but we were too busy having fun with uncle james to comment on it. happy 1.5, baby girl!

it's been busybusybusy at the klapow house these days. last weekend more internet friends came to play! 6 parents, 2 toddlers, one baby, one dog and 5 cameras. yes, the cameras DID out number the babies! it took seeing mia with lilja for me to realize that she's really not a baby anymore. she's a little girl. a little girl with a shoe obsession.

on wednesday uncle james came into town! we rarely get to see him in person and mia hasn't seen him in 15 months so it was a treat for everyone. plus we got to take time off in the middle of the week to hang out - bonus!

mia wasn't sure what to make of uncle james' tattoos. i don't think she was impressed, though. she kept looking at them like "um, you've got crayon all over you, dude. do you want a napkin to wipe that off?" outside of the tattoos uncle james is the most exciting thing around, though. he's all fun all the time! mia woke up this morning and the first thing out of her mouth was "uncle james!!" it was sad to see him go but we take what we can get.

****

and now we'll talk poop.

the constipation isn't going away. she's afraid to poop so she holds it in. making it worse. same story, different day.

our friends suggested that we try fruit-eze as their nephews use it with great success. we checked it out and it sounded like the perfect solution. so we ordered it! hope is a powerful thing and it was coming in the mail! wednesday night there was a package at the front door - the pooping solution was here!! all 5 lbs. of it! yes, 5 lbs of a raisin/prune/date/prune juice paste. so much pooping paste!

it tastes like raisins. mia loves raisins. mia will not eat the pooping paste. not in her yogurt. not on toast. not on a cracker. not from a spoon. not in a pb&j sandwich.

meanwhile josh and i have been eating small bites of it to show mia how yummy it is (it really does just taste like raisins) and we can tell you first hand that it works. even in small doses.

cabbage patch days

2006-03-06T09:21:00.000-08:00

mia just rediscovered the cabbage patch kid that aunt nancy gave her for her birthday. she has spent the last hour totally involved with her.

she's so interested in the dolls parts - it's really cool. she'll point to the belly button, then find hers, point to her eyes, then to her own, and on and on it goes. and the baby has SHOES! take them off! put them on! MEASE!!! A CHOOO!!!

right now she is "napping" with her baby in the tent.

god i love this kid.

she dreams of snow.

2006-03-04T17:34:00.000-08:00

even though she doesn't know what snow is and has never met her east coast internet friends, mia dreams of colder climates.

today was another day where mia cried until we let her walk around the house in her flannel pajamas, snow boots, daddy's gloves and mama's snow hat. for hours.

and how do we not have a photo of that?!

***

for those playing along: baba now also means "pocket". yes, mia has discovered the joy that is pockets. things go in! things come out! hooray!

what's that you said?

2006-03-02T11:00:00.000-08:00

mia's got a lot to say for a 17 month old. unfortunately, unless you're her mama (because not even josh knows what she's saying 1/2 the time) you're going to need some help understanding her. and i'm here to help! here are a couple you would never figure out:

cha cha - charlie (the dog) or her colors (crayons). depends on inflection and proximity to either of these things.
ba ba - bottle (sippy cup) or potty (although it's evolving to fva fva- even though she can say potty, she won't)
see! - sesame street!
moo mee - excuse me (said after a burp or fart of if you should sit on her and she can't get up)

ok, that's really it. if you can't figure out the rest you just aren't trying.

******

things i should have been taking note of over the past few weeks but didn't:

when mia sees a truck she gets very excited and starts screaming "truck!" if you say that it's a big truck she will respond every time with "wow!"
her favorite games include: yelling at you to "LIE DOW!", going night night under a blanket (if you don't have a blanket she will not relent until you get her one) and spinning in circles until she falls down.
mia likes to stick her hands under her carseat straps and yell "i stuh!" (stuck) until you play along and she then shows you that you've been fooled and she's not really stuck at all (oh, mia - you got us again...). the other day supergrover got stuck in a tree and she started giggling and screaming "stuh!" oh grover...
until just this week (and no, i didn't get this on video, either) mia was very busy shaking her finger and giving a firm "no! no! no!" to anything that she shouldn't be doing, the dog, the kids in her class, her teachers, waiters, etc. how'd she get so bossy? i guess we'll never know...

****

last weekend we went to habitot with our friends lisa and katia. there was water and paint and kids! a crazy good time. then we met up with mia's best friend, josie, and her moms for a romp at the park and a sleepover. can i just say that these girls are awesome? they love each other and play really well together (unless it involves baby strollers or wrestling) and are simply the cutest little girls on the planet. no really - see for yourself:

****

and as for the potty "training" we're doing? well...besides the liquid poop of last month mia hasn't pooped in her diaper in a couple months. pretty awesome. except that it's mostly because she hates to poop because, well, anyway...

but this last weekend she came and got us nearly every single time she had to PEE. and held it until we got her to a potty (which once involved getting off of the freeway and finding a bathroom)! it's really freaking us out. on the one hand it'll be awesome to have her out of diapers and not have to buy them anymore. on the other hand we'll have to be really on top of her going to the potty before trips, taking extra outfits everywhere we go (just in case there's an accident).

so basically? diapers are great because they allow us to be lazy. terrible, i know. we're talking with her daycare about being more in top of her potty training this week. the only problem is that, as noted above, no one knows what the hell she's saying when she has to go potty. oh well - it'll happen.

poop!!

2006-02-14T11:58:00.000-08:00

as you may have heard, mia has had some pretty adult poop lately. but even now that her diet is more balanced (less cheese!) she is having a hard time. you see, she's afraid of pooping. so she waits. and waits. and then? well it's a lot and it hurts. and so, against my wishes, josh has been giving mia cherry juice (cut with water) during meals. (you see where this is going, right?)

this morning josh and i blamed the terrible smell in the hallway on each other "you farted, nasty!" and i left for work. josh called later on to let me know that it wasn't a fart we smelled - it was mia!

she pooped in her sleep (something she hasn't done since she was a wee wee infant) and it was liquid and it was everywhere.

happy valentine's day!

baby boy crazy

2006-02-14T11:46:00.000-08:00

michaela's cousin's wife had a baby boy last month (hi, scott!!) and they sent out birth announcements with his sweet sleeping face on them (aw...). mia has been carrying that thing around for weeks now. she says "night night, baby" and gives him kisses. the other day she was telling him all about josh's yo-yo.

yesterday mia got a valentine in the mail from an internet friend of hers, henry. he's a cute one, that henry! and yes, mia has agreed to be his. she carried the card around (his photo on it, of course) and took it for pretend naps and hugged it. i told her to give henry kisses and she returned the card to me a couple minutes later with a soggy hole in it. she had been sucking on it. ew!

man, we're in trouble!

zoos and open houses and burps!

2006-02-12T20:05:00.000-08:00

we spent a couple hours at the zoo today and had a great time. thank god our zoo is small because mia refused to sit in the stroller and had her own ideas on what was interesting. who knew that there were so many benches for us to sit in? not me! mia found great joy in discovering them all.

most of the animals were enjoying the early spring...laying around in the sun and sleeping. so mostly we just wandered from bench to bench, exhibit to exhibit, saying "shhh...night night" and "chair!" and so we got a year-long pass, of course!

after the zoo we decided to hit up a bunch of open houses in our area. at the very first one mia decided she had to go potty. and so there we were, in a strangers house, singing the potty song and high 5ing for the big poop. i was so embarassed (the owners were there) that i didn't bother to put a diaper on her on the way out. at the next house josh suggested that i throw a diaper on her but i thought that surely she wouldn't pee - she'd just gone potty! but no. she peed. in her pants, without a diaper, in a strangers house. we left, laughing our heads off! she spent the next couple open houses in her diaper. we're classy like that.

mia has a couple of new things to say these days. "big kids" - because they're so cool, you know. and "moo me" (excuse me) - she says it after each burp or fart without coaxing.

life could not be better.

mahna mahna

2006-02-10T08:25:00.000-08:00

on our last trip to visit josie we were blown away to hear her singing the abc's and the barney theme song. seriously. she's 16 months old and can sing songs (in toddler words). the tunes are there - it's amazing!

any time you ask mia to sing she will belt out a toneless string of 4 "la"s. it's from the elmo song. it's sweet but a little sad.

so...lately josh and i have had the muppet show song "mahna mahna/lullaby of birdland" in our heads. you know the one, right? so here's how it goes...

us: do do do do do...
mia: mahna!
us: do do do do...
mia: mahna!
(and on and on)

cutest damn thing ever! thank you, josie, for letting us know that mia might be able to move past lalalala. it's no abc's but she's working on it.

science is fun

2006-02-07T12:04:00.000-08:00

today's lesson: babies stay dizzy for a long time.

mia loves the chair in our office. it spins! whee!! every day she runs in there and screams "whee!!" until i sit in the chair with her.

yesterday i put her in the chair all alone and spun her around slowly. and then her eyes glazed over and she tipped to one side. and giggled. i took her out and held her for a while. she was all bug-eyed and couldn't sit up straight. couldn't stand up .

and wanted more.

whee!!!

"i love you" means "good bye"

2006-02-07T11:58:00.000-08:00

when josh and i are on the phone we always end our calls with "i love you". so much so that we now take it as a sign that the other is going to get off the phone soon. so we joke that "i love you" just means "good bye" with us.

and so it is with mia.

tell her "i love you" and she'll pretty well ignore you. or get pissed if you're in her room because it must mean you'll be putting her to bed. ask her to say "i love you" to grandma on the phone? "bye bye" and she hangs up on grandma. nice, huh?

it's not like we don't tell her "i love you" all the time, either. she's just keyed in on the times when it means "good bye" and "good night". weird.

friends

2006-02-07T11:48:00.000-08:00

2 weeks ago we headed to san francisco to hang out with friends we met on the internet (gasp!) - a good time was had by all, especially the babies.

it was the first time we'd really seen mia interact with her friends. she's at daycare all day and there aren't any kids her age on our street (oh hell, there might be, we don't know our neighbors) so we never see her with other kids. it's been a couple months since mia and josie had seen each other - they have changed so much! no more walking past each other without a glance. now they play together! there was much running and screaming and giggling and holy crap i have a daughter who screams and giggles!

josie is mia's first real friend - don't they just look like trouble?!

"think time"

2006-01-25T14:04:00.000-08:00

monday mia put herself in "think time"* twice.

she had been climbing on the eliptical trainer (hey, someone's gotta use it) and slamming a dresser drawer closed over and over again - both strict no-no's. i talked to her calmly about it and tried to direct her attentin elsewhere but she was just in a trance with the bad behavior. so i counted. "1...2..." it was here that she stopped what she was doing and sat herself down with her back against the wall. i told her she didn't have to go into "think time" and we'd just go and play something else. but no. she sat perfectly still for about 30 seconds and then exclaimed "all done!" and we moved on to the next activity.

how weird is that?

* "think time" is her daycare's term for "time out"